Why?

Why did it turn out like this...

For the first time, I had someone I liked. Someone who could be a friend for life.

Two joys overlapped. And these joys brought even more happiness. What I gained should have been blissful as a dream...

But why... why did it become like this?

Why are you so experienced, Yu Qingyu?

Why did you accept it so naturally, Bai Su?

Why is all this happening?

...

After Xiao Yu left, I fell into an endless loop of philosophical thoughts.

Countless "whys" formed a twisted maze before me, trapping me at its center.

Through the maze’s warped windows, I saw Bai Su standing outside.

He absentmindedly touched his lips, his expression—even a hint of savoring???

A nameless fire suddenly blazed in my heart.

Gritting my teeth, I crawled out of bed. This action only deepened my desolation.

Bai Su, you idiot!

While your sister lies sick in bed, you flirt with another woman right before her eyes! Doing something so shameless!

Unforgivable!

Heaven’s punishment!

Fueled by rage, I lunged at Bai Su.

Bai Su startled at the sight of me—staggering up, face twisted—but instinctively reached to catch me.

He misjudged my weight and momentum.

I misjudged too.

I pinned him down; he held me. We tumbled smoothly to the floor, rolling into a mess.

No fan-service tropes appeared. Instead, the floor’s recoil jolted me hard.

Those TV drama clichés don’t work in reality.

How could two people fall mouth-to-mouth by chance? The impact alone would knock anyone out.

Luckily, Bai Su was my human sandbag beneath me.

Luckily, he held me tight, cushioning most of the force with his body.

"Su Su... you okay?" Bai Su’s anxious voice reached my ear, warm breath brushing my skin.

That familiar masculine scent.

A trace of ruggedness, a hint of youth—hot, firm.

It hit my earlobe, sending tingles like an electric shock.

My body stiffened instinctively.

We lay face-to-face on my floor, pressed close. Summer clothes thin, I felt his heat through bare arms.

That scent—I once owned it. Now lost.

But this heat only fueled my disgust.

I’m not Bai Su anymore. Not a man.

I told myself.

I’m a girl now. Bai Susu... a girl.

What should a girl do here?

Scream? Shove Bai Su away? Tremble like a quail, crawling to bed to cower in the corner?

Or submit? Snuggle in his arms, act cute, whine, play pitiful like a normal sister?

I didn’t know.

So I did nothing.

I just hugged him tighter—this body I once had—never loosening my grip.

"Su Su... why cling so hard?" Bai Su’s embarrassed voice sounded above me.

I looked up. He’d raised his head. From his chest, I saw faint stubble on his chin and a glaring pimple beside it.

Right.

Lately, he’s pulled all-nighters to stockpile drafts—unlike those lazy authors from my past timeline.

His schedule’s messy. No time for grooming. Stubble grew unchecked, making him look scruffy.

Yet he never complained.

I felt a sudden warmth, an indescribable ache.

This timeline’s Bai Su isn’t the useless me from before. He’s stepped from shadows, learning to shoulder burdens.

He’s trying to hold up this family.

He’s no longer my old self. A new existence—transcending me, walking a different path. A mature man.

"Su Su, up—don’t you know you’re heavy? Crushing me!"

Bai Su’s grumbling cut through my thoughts.

...Retract that!

I stood, face cold, and kicked him—

"Get up, idiot."

[Cold Mode - Su Su Limited Edition.jpg]

Bai Su rose, confused, rubbing his head.

My gaze turned icy.

Normal humans can’t talk to idiots like him.

But even an idiot isn’t a clueless paramecium. He finally sensed my mood.

Worried, he asked:

"Su Su... what’s wrong?"

As he slowly got up.

"Out!" I snapped.

"Huh? Su Su—"

"I said out! Deaf or dense? Need a repeat?"

"But—"

"No buts! Pervert! Hentai! Paramecium! Amoeba!"

"Whoa whoa—what’s this?! Why am I sinking down the evolutionary ladder?! Your brother’s no lowly microbe—hey, don’t push! Fine, I’m going!"

*Bang—*

I slammed the door shut and locked it.

I leaned against it, listening to Bai Su’s muffled grumbles fade as he left.

My strength drained. I slid down the door, sitting on the floor.

Ceramic tiles—cold, hard. My mind churned in chaos.

What is Xiao Yu? What role did she play in my last timeline? How long had she planned to confess to that fool Bai Su?

Thoughts tangled, swirling. My mood sank.

I hugged my knees, burying my head.

My rebirth—in this timeline of infinite variables—what does it even mean?

[To Be Continued]