The peaceful, idyllic academy life didn’t last as I’d hoped.

On the very first school day after the holiday break, my grandfather delivered thoroughly unwelcome news the night before.

Storms always come. The people you dread inevitably arrive.

Miss Beren—the Elvenfolk elder overseeing "disciplinary matters"—had already arrived in the Kingdom of Lothric with several other elders. Their purpose was clear: stay in Luo City for a while, study human "educational methods," and foster "harmonious relations" between our races.

Frankly, I cared little about that. What mattered was this "Elder Beren" herself.

Grandfather said she wasn’t just inspecting my academy—she’d already taken a position there as a temporary literature teacher.

In short: we’d gained an Elf teacher.

An Elf teacher! Such a classic trope! No doubt she’d show up in a sleek black OL suit and stockings, radiating allure!

Sure, Serica was that type too—but she was a mother. That gave me pause. This Elder Beren, though? Rumor said she was very young…

The ero manga incident was resolved. Now I just needed to keep up appearances…

…

My optimism vanished fast.

The next morning, enduring Lorian and Furide’s noisy bickering as I headed for class, I spotted an Elf at the academy gates—strangely familiar yet unfamiliar.

Clad in a tight skirt and heels, she looked every inch a teacher. And right now, she was diligently fulfilling her duty: inspecting students for contraband at dawn.

"Hold it! You—yes, you! The one avoiding eye contact! Open your bag for inspection! Human student!"

Her high heels clacked sharply against the stone.

Bent over, checking bags with intense focus, she didn’t notice the hungry stares of nearby boys. Sometimes, having *that* kind of figure was a curse.

"T-This is… illicit material! And—and it’s from that *censored*-breast teacher series!" Her voice trembled slightly, but she kept a stern face as she tossed the book into a basket beside her.

"Shameless! At your age, you should be studying—not lusting after your teachers! You… you humans truly need proper discipline!" She cleared her throat sharply and pointed. "You! Report to my office after first period for *detention*! I’m Beren, your new literature teacher. Understood?!"

"Yes, Teacher!" The boy replied eagerly.

Of course he did. Being scolded by a teacher like her? I’d volunteer too.

"Teacher! I… I brought unhealthy books too! I surrender!"

"Me too! Can I visit your office after class?!"

"Should I run to the bookstore now?!"

Soon, boys everywhere were having sudden "crises of conscience," turning themselves in.

"You… you humans are… *cough*! Self-awareness is commendable, but punishment is still necessary! All of you—my office after class!"

"Yes, TEACHER!!!"

The Elf teacher, still looking like a stern young woman, scolded them while confiscating books.

Today’s academy felt… unusually lively.

…

Furide’s eyes lit up beside me.

"Ah! That’s Elder Beren!" He tugged my sleeve. Today, Fuu had finally worn proper boys’ clothes as I’d insisted—but his long hair gave him away. He looked exactly like a girl in a male uniform…

"Master, that’s the Beren I always talk about! Huh? You’re not surprised at all?"

"A-About what? Yeah, sure." I sighed inwardly.

I’d already met her once.

Miss Beren—the Elf elder in charge of "discipline," soon to be our temporary teacher…

Wasn’t she the same rigid, rule-obsessed Elf who’d *gushed like a fountain* from a nosebleed after reading ero manga outside my castle?!

*Elder Beren!* You couldn’t handle *one* ero manga without hemorrhaging—how will your nose survive confiscating all these?!

As I hesitated, Beren shooed the lingering students through the gates. Then she bent down, slowly gathering the basket full of "illicit materials." Her wobbling posture suggested this was no small trial.

Fuu and little Flan rushed over.

"Elder Beren!"

"Eh? Flan?!" At the sight of the umbrella-holding, shyly smiling Flan, Beren’s stern mask melted into a radiant, tender smile.

Honestly, if she smiled like that more often, her charm would skyrocket…

"It’s been… so long!" She bent down and pulled Flan into a tight hug.

I’ll admit—I stared a little too long at that dazzling smile. Lorian pinched my waist in disapproval.

"I was busy paying respects to the Queen and couldn’t visit. Fuu too—long time no see. You’ve grown even pretti—wait. Fuu, your hair…?"

"Ah! Elder Beren, it’s because—"

Reunited with family, Furide beamed, gesturing wildly as he explained.

But instinct screamed: *Sneak into the academy. Now.*

…

"Lorian… c-can you cover for me? I’ll slip in quietly." I turned to her.

Her expression was equally strained.

"Sorry… Xiao Ya-ge. Let’s… sneak in together. I have… a bit of history with that Elf." She grabbed my hand.

Since I wore the girls’ uniform, we planned to pose as "two close friends" walking to class—blending in to slip inside.

Just as we almost made it unnoticed…

Fuu the idiot chose the *worst* possible moment to point.

"Ah! That’s my master, Arisa! Elder Beren!"

*FURIDE, YOU IDIOT! DO YOU WANT ME TO MAKE YOU REGRET IT?!*

"Eh? That man’s son is him?! You—black-haired girl! STOP!"

"!"

Beren’s sharp voice froze me mid-step. I turned like a rusted machine.

The instant she saw my face, her warm smile vanished. Back to stern, rigid Beren.

*Dead. I’m dead. She saw me in boys’ clothes yesterday!*

I wore the girls’ uniform today—but if she recognized me…

"T-Teacher! Haha…" I forced a stiff grin, hoping to bluff through.

But this Elf wasn’t letting go.

"You… this appearance… could it be…"

*Yes! The one who saw you gush blood like a sprinkler yesterday—*

"—the cross-dressing pervert AriOsa who defiled Fuu and Flan in that manga?!"

*HA! Nailed it! That’s the manga protag Ar—*

…

…

*Huh?*

**WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?!**

HOW DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THOSE BURNED-TO-ASHES BLACK HISTORY FILES?!