“A calamity of the undead, huh…”
I rubbed my jawbone and glanced at the skeleton soldiers lined up beside me. In my mind, I saw myself commanding an army of a million undead, standing proud and triumphant.
The desire for power made something itch deep inside me.
But reason eventually crushed that fleeting urge. I sighed softly and decided to look into something a little more practical.
“That can wait. For now, I should figure out what these skeleton soldiers can do.”
【Fair point.】
So I casually pointed at one of the skeleton soldiers.
“You! Chop your own head off! All the way off!”
“Klak klak.”
Crack!
The instant its head came off, its massive body collapsed to the ground and went silent. The faint soul-flame in its skull gradually faded away.
I poked the skull that had rolled to my feet and sighed.
“Looks like ordinary skeleton soldiers can’t separate their heads from their bodies like I can… They die if they lose their heads. I was hoping I could have them go off and do things separately.”
【Record complete.】
Next, I took the four skeleton soldiers I had left and found another wandering skeleton soldier. Then I had the four of them block its path.
“Klak.”
It walked straight into them, then bobbed its head around and changed direction.
It made no attempt to attack.
Looks like they can’t tell friend from foe on their own.
In that case…
“Get it! Beat the crap out of it!” I pointed at the random skeleton soldier from before.
“Klak!!”
The four hulking skeletons didn’t hesitate. They swung their thighbones and battered swords, launching into a five-way free-for-all with it.
The poor skeleton soldier barely got in a couple of hits before someone smashed its head in and sent it off to be reincarnated.
That wasn’t what I cared about, though.
“So it does fight back…”
It wouldn’t attack enemies that were also skeleton soldiers, nor skeleton soldiers from a different faction…
But it would attack anything that attacked it.
“I see… I’ll need some more test subjects.”
After running a few more experiments, I came up with the “Three Laws of Skeletons.”
1. Skeletons don’t attack skeletons.
Under normal circumstances, wild skeleton soldiers won’t attack any other skeleton soldiers in sight, even if they belong to a different faction or clearly intend to attack them.
2. Skeletons will unconditionally attack anything that attacks them, as well as any non-skeleton creature in sight.
I tested this with Eileen before. The moment they see her, they’ll try to kill her. But if I hold her in my arms, the skeleton soldiers see the two of us as a single skeleton unit and stop attacking.
And if I—or any other skeleton soldier—doesn’t attack them first, they’ll simply ignore us. I could even dig a trap right in front of one, and it’d just stare blankly and step straight into it.
On the other hand, it doesn’t matter what you are. If you attack them, they’ll always fight back—to the death.
【A monster that’s both terrifying and pitiful, in a way.】That was Paper-chan’s assessment.
3. The traits of skeletons.
This one’s more of a trait than a law. First of all, they have no sense of smell or sight, and no intelligence whatsoever. I could pour fresh horse manure over their heads and they’d keep walking with their skulls covered in shit. And don’t even get me started on how I spent a full thirty minutes hurling vulgarities at one skeleton soldier, and it didn’t even acknowledge me.
But these skeleton soldiers are incredibly sensitive to sound, and they consider any excessively loud noise an attack.
Thanks to that, they nearly tore me apart when I first got here…
Then again, now that I think about it, dealing with a horde of skeleton soldiers should be pretty simple.
Get a few dozen workers to dig a deep pit in three days, then get a DJI drone with an ’80s radio strapped to it, blast “Gili Gili Love” at them, lure them into the pit, and finish them off with a single fire.
No wonder necromancers have never made much of a splash in this country.
“Wait a second…”
Suddenly, an idea hit me. My jaw tilted up at a bizarre, crazed angle.
【What did you think of?】
“Paper-chan, don’t you think… these skeleton soldiers are a lot like the zombies in Earth movies and TV shows…?”
【You could say that. They attack humans without fail, never rest or sleep, don’t need to eat, and are sensitive to sound.】
But then I raised a question that could turn the history of zombie fiction on its head.
“So where does a zombie get its energy from?”
【……】
When Paper-chan fell silent, I flailed around, trying to explain my theory.
“Think about it! The zombies in movies are just like the skeleton soldiers here! They have no energy source, but they can keep moving for months, even a whole year! That’s not realistic! What about protein and the conservation of energy?! Damn it, even old man Joule must be spinning in his grave!”
【…They’re movies. Why are you taking them so seriously? Besides, the skeleton soldiers here run on magic. As long as they have some magic, it can make them move. That’s perfectly scientific.】
I thought for a while, then shook my head.
“I can’t help thinking those zombies have a zero-point energy generator in their stomachs. And these skeleton soldiers only need a tiny bit of magic to move?”
【In standby mode, one energy point per day. That’s very little.】
Smack!!
At that, I gave the thighbone of the skeleton soldier beside me a hard whack!
“Holy crap!! Then why bother making an undead army?!”
“Put these skeletons to work generating electricity!!”
At my words, all four skeleton soldiers turned to look at me in perfect unison, their jaws twitching. Perhaps they were worried about a future of being drained dry day and night.
Paper-chan froze for a second, then asked in its usual icy voice.
【Wait, what did you just say…?】
“Skeleton power generation!” I repeated.
【……】
“No operating costs! We’d only need a factory and equipment! Even if we made them turn cranks by hand, these skeleton soldiers could generate power nonstop, twenty-four hours a day! That’d produce way more energy than this tiny bit of magic!”
“A renewable resource! A biological product! Eco-friendly and highly efficient! What could be better?!”
【……】
Paper-chan was stunned, so I rambled on about my wonderful vision of the future.
“Forget all that garbage about nuclear fusion, quantum whatever, and tidal power! Catch some skeleton soldiers! Human-powered electricity! Holy crap, this would be pure profit!”
“Damn, use skeletons to generate electricity and we’d reach a Type III civilization in no time! We’d have to start manufacturing skeleton soldiers ourselves! Seriously, it’s eco-friendly and harmless! Biological robots! When we build spaceships, why bother with engine rooms and fuel rooms? Just put in a skeleton power plant!”
……
…
Gurgle, gurgle, gurgle.
After my passionate speech, the only ones staring at me like I was an idiot were a few skeleton soldiers. The skull rolling around on the ground was the only one that managed to tell me, through its actions—
Get lost, idiot!
【That… um, that’s a good idea.】
Paper-chan even sounded unusually regretful.
【But it’s actually impossible. People in this world have no understanding of electricity as a form of energy. They have lightning magic, but they have no foundation for electricity at all.】
“Isn’t that great? We can recreate it using what we know from Earth!”
【It’s impossible.】
I froze.
“W-why not…?”
【Leaving aside whether researching this stuff is worthwhile in a world with magic, it would take decades. During that time, you’d also need a huge amount of money and would have to keep your identity secret. And on top of that, seriously delaying the mission is something the main system won’t allow.】
I felt a little disappointed and sighed.
“All right… But maybe I’ll get a chance in the future, once I’m stronger…”
【By then, you’ll be able to summon an army of a million undead with a wave of your hand. Do you think you’ll still care about this kind of technology?】
“Emmmmm, I guess you’re right… But there are so many free laborers here. It feels like a waste to leave them unused.” As I spoke, I picked up the skull rolling on the ground and used Bone Synthesis to repair my left eye, which had been shot out earlier.
“Phew, I can finally see clearly.”
【If you want, you can control any skeleton soldiers on the first or second floor. But the skeleton soldiers on the third floor are expected to be above level 30, and by then you won’t be able to control them. You’ll have to make up for the huge gap in strength with sheer numbers.】
I took a moment to process that.
“You mean…”
【All the skeleton soldiers here are your reserve army—a tireless, undying legion of the undead. Their levels are low, and there are only a little over a hundred of them.】
“No, no! That’s already great!” Looking at the skeleton soldiers waiting for my orders, I could feel myself getting excited.
“Then let’s grab a few more and clear out the second basement level for some EXP!”
【Sounds good.】
No sooner said than done!
Before long, I’d recruited nine teammates (tools), pushing Paper-chan’s load to 90%. Then we set off for the second floor in a mighty procession.
The skeleton archers on the second floor were powerful and incredibly accurate, but there weren’t many of them, and most wandered around alone. After losing three skeleton warriors, I recruited four skeleton archers to make up for our lack of ranged firepower.
If I level up enough to control twenty of them, I’d like to try Napoleon’s three-rank firing formation with the skeleton archers.
“Well, that’s for later! Hey!! You there, bonehead!!”
I taunted a skeleton soldier that was about to lunge at one of my skeleton warriors.
Super effective!
The skeleton soldier charged!
It fell into the trap!
I killed it!
【Ding-dong.】
【Energy points gained: 22.】
Paper-chan’s notification chimed. I looked at the skeleton warrior smashed into a pile at my feet, then at the skeleton archer lying in the simple pit, its skull smashed in by me. I gave orders to the few teammates I had left.
“Number One, cover Number Two. Number Three, throw your thighbone to draw in an enemy. Numbers Four and Five, sneak up behind the skeleton soldier we lure over. Numbers Six and Seven, keep searching to the left and right. There should only be a few left.”
“Klak klak.”
The skeleton soldiers bobbed their heads and got to work. Meanwhile, I followed Paper-chan’s directions along the route we’d taken earlier and found the entrance to the third basement level.
“It’s getting darker and darker…”
Even with my night vision skill, a feeling of unease and fear crept into my heart as I looked down into the pitch-black depths.
Just as I was debating whether to go straight down, a few skeleton soldiers finished their task and gathered around me.
“Oh! Perfect timing! You, come here!” I casually pointed at one of them.
It paused for a moment, then walked straight over to the spiral passage leading to the third basement level.
Then I kicked it down!!
A little over two seconds later, a clear clang rang out. With it came the feeling that some wire in my brain had snapped.
“Paper-chan, how is it?”
【The floor of the third basement level is 37 meters below. Based on the sonar echo, there are also large skeleton soldiers over two meters tall.】
【I recommend coming back another day. If you go down there now, you’ll just be serving yourself up on a platter.】
“…All right… You lot, find somewhere near the entrance on the first floor and bury yourselves. Bury yourselves deep.” I figured I could put them to use again when I came back next time.
“Klak klak.”
The few surviving skeleton soldiers exchanged glances, then stomped off toward the first basement level with absolutely no regard for anyone around them.
