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14. Regrets in His Youth
update icon Updated at 2026/5/3 23:30:02

They said they were pulling an all-nighter gaming, but in reality, neither of them even made it to midnight before getting sleepy.

The next morning, as soon as he woke up, Yu Mo went back home and kept catching up on sleep.

Leng Shuang got up, washed up, then flopped back onto the bed, like a salted fish. He had no idea what he was supposed to do.

The college entrance exams were over. That meant the tense, stifling days were over too. All the textbooks had been sold off. Without any books to read, life suddenly felt a lot more boring.

Only then did Leng Shuang realize that he seemed to have almost no entertainment at all. Ever since he started living in this world, all he knew was studying.

He'd always worked hard, sure, but his brain clearly didn't have much of an edge in that area.

"Looks like my only entertainment was listening to Yu Mo ramble."

Thinking of that, Leng Shuang smiled helplessly.

Now that the exams were over, and all this free time was no longer occupied by books, he had to find some way to kill time.

He couldn't go bother Lin Mo right now. Lin Mo was about to start working a summer job to save money for college.

As the Demon Capital, Sakura City was on a completely different level from everywhere else when it came to living costs. So people who had spent time in Sakura City all carried a certain arrogance. Especially those who even owned a home in this Demon Capital. They looked down on outsiders even more, thinking they were all country bumpkins.

Even so, Lin Mo had still promised Leng Shuang that she would buy a house in the Demon Capital, and the two of them would get married there!

What lofty ambition.

If that got posted online, it would definitely draw endless ridicule. People would think it was just some hot-blooded nonsense from the young, like, "If xx gets taken down, I won't mind destroying human civilization. None of you are getting away when that happens."

But Leng Shuang felt that Lin Mo hadn't said it on a youthful impulse.

"Do your best!"

Leng Shuang clenched his fist. He was cheering for Lin Mo, and also for himself.

"I need to work hard too. I can't leave all the burden to her alone!"

This was the dream an eighteen-year-old couple had dreamed together.

He picked up his phone and looked at the thing with its shattered screen and constant lag. Leng Shuang felt that step one was replacing it.

After that, he'd slowly work on himself, and learn how, as a man, he could help shoulder things for his wife.

He unlocked his phone and looked through the many confession messages in his inbox.

There were way too many. If he replied one by one, who knew when he'd finish. He barely knew most of these people anyway. The ones he knew, he'd answer properly. The ones he didn't, he'd send a mass rejection.

Just as Leng Shuang was about to do that, he saw a profile picture that looked somewhat familiar.

"Yurikawa Yuriko?!"

How was that possible?

A trace of surprise appeared on Leng Shuang's face. He checked the time the message had been sent. It was right after the exam had ended.

"This..."

In that instant, his thoughts turned complicated.

When it came to other girls' confessions, Leng Shuang could stay mostly unmoved. But if it was Yurikawa Yuriko, then no matter what, his heart was bound to feel a little complicated.

At school, she was a classmate he had been quite close with. No matter how many times seats got rearranged, she was always by his side. She'd talk to him from time to time. It had already become part of everyday life.

She was kind of like a knight...

That thought suddenly popped into Leng Shuang's mind.

Because she really had always been there by his side. Whenever he ran into trouble, she would appear at just the right moment and naturally help him solve it. In fact, he had spent even more time with her than with Lin Mo.

Everything had felt so natural. So natural that Leng Shuang had thought it was simply everyday life.

And now, being confessed to by someone so familiar, how could the lake in his heart not ripple at all?

"So... she liked me..."

Leng Shuang had never realized it.

She had entered his life too naturally. So naturally that he never noticed, and only thought it was the normal kind of mutual help between classmates.

Now that he thought about it, the reason he hadn't noticed was because he was the one being loved.

Otherwise, why would she have treated him so well for no reason?

Leng Shuang looked at the confession on the cracked phone screen, his gaze complicated.

"Leng Shuang, I'm not someone who's good at writing love letters. I don't really know how to use fancy words, so I thought maybe I could tell you to your face. But sadly, on the day the exams ended, you never showed up in the classroom. I waited a long time, and you still didn't come..."

"I liked you from the moment school started. Every time we did group exercises, I'd always secretly line up behind you and watch your back. More than once, I got so absorbed that... the inspector docked points from me."

"You might not remember, but the first time our eyes met was during military training. You were tall, wearing that camouflage uniform. When the instructor had the boys turn around and face us, it just so happened that I was right in front of you. When I saw that awkward, shy look on your face, my heart was stolen on the spot. My mind was full of you. The way you looked that day in that camo short-sleeved shirt... I'll never forget it for the rest of my life..."

"Later on, I realized your personality was different from other boys. You didn't talk much, but you seemed more open and easygoing. You didn't have that awkward fussiness most boys do, and you weren't picky either. I got more and more fascinated by how different you were, so whenever seats got changed, I always fought to sit next to you. You probably couldn't tell, right? Those seats were bought, hehe [embarrassed]."

"I always wanted to catch your attention. Every time I talked to someone else, I'd rest my elbow by the edge of your desk. Sometimes I'd lean back on purpose and let my tied-up hair brush against your desk. Other times, I'd try to show off my family background..."

"Of course, I think my figure is pretty good too. At least way better than most flat boards. I've always been secretly watching you, and I noticed that sometimes you'd secretly glance at my chest too. At times like that, I'd always feel secretly delighted. Just one look from you could make me happy for the whole day. Even the school cafeteria food would taste especially good."

"I've always wanted to confess to you, but I was afraid you wouldn't say yes. So I kept struggling with it, all the way until now. So I just want to ask you this: do you like me too?"

After reading Yuriko's confession, Leng Shuang recalled everything from the past. Lying on the bed and staring at the ceiling, he couldn't come back to himself for a long, long time.

Military training. Group exercises. Her chatting with him during breaks. That sakura-pink hair. Those firm, proud curves...

The images kept surfacing in Leng Shuang's mind.

It felt like something had tugged hard at his heart. It hurt terribly.

At last, his youth had become tangled with complexity and regret.

That murky, indescribable emotion made his chest feel as if it were being crushed by a thousand-pound boulder. It was suffocating.

Leng Shuang slowly closed his eyes, wanting to reject such thoughts. But the more he resisted, the heavier they became.

Gradually, he opened his eyes again. His lips trembled.

"So... I really did like Yuriko back then..."