Tick, tick.

Lu Li had always liked the sound of an alarm clock. It was like rain. Sounds like that calmed him, as if his thoughts were drifting into a forest mottled with light and shadow. Time flowed on as usual. 7:15 a.m. became 7:16 a.m. The Earth kept turning. Everything was normal.

The date on the calendar was August 26, 2017.

That was the only thing that wasn’t normal. No—maybe the one truly abnormal thing was Lu Li himself.

The man in the mirror had lost the weariness on his face, and the bluish stubble too. His gaze was no longer deep and heavy. He looked clean, like a white shirt carried in by the wind. His eyes were bright, and soft fuzz still lined the corners of his lips. After a long while, he finally laughed out loud.

He and An Baili had gotten married on October 22, 2022.

But twenty years later, their marriage had finally come to an end.

Lu Li gently placed the divorce papers in front of An Baili and said in a flat voice, “I’m tired.”

An Baili’s eyes widened. She was as beautiful as she had been twenty years ago, even refined now into a charm all her own. But her temper was the same too. It had never changed. In disbelief, she asked, “Is it because I can’t give you a child?”

Was it?

Maybe that was part of it. In his heart, Lu Li gave himself one more excuse.

An Baili had once meant that much to him. She had been his moonlight and his red rose. He had once drowned in her tenderness, unable to pull himself free. But when love ebbed away, what remained was nothing but a mess and a silence too awkward to bear.

He didn’t want to come home after a full day of work and still have to coax her like a daughter. He didn’t want to keep indulging her unconditionally like he had when he was young. He didn’t want to be worn down by her random outbursts. He didn’t want to drag his exhausted body home and still cook every meal himself. He didn’t want a wallet without even enough change for parking. He didn’t want... too many things. In the end, he was just tired.

He wanted to be the one loved and cared for too, not the one always giving. An Baili had stayed a girl until the very end, but he, Lu Li, was no longer a boy.

Lu Li didn’t answer her. He lowered his eyes, as if dozing.

An Baili grew agitated. “I don’t agree!” Then her voice turned wronged and pleading. “Don’t leave me, okay...?”

Here it comes again...

Lu Li didn’t look up. He knew he couldn’t resist An Baili’s tears. The moment she cried, he’d lose all sense of direction. Pathetic. Stupid.

An Baili moved closer. Her warm body pressed against him as she pitifully wrapped her arms around her husband. “I don’t want a divorce.”

Still no answer.

“I let you bully me for all these years, and now you’re just going to throw me away like a rag?” She rubbed her cheek against him like a kitten. It was a habit she’d had since she was young. She was obsessed with his scent, his voice, everything about him. To her, Lu Li was the most special, the most important person in the world. No one else even came close.

“Are you going to find Wen Amber? Or Chen Jianing?” Her voice grew even more pitiful. “Don’t be with them, okay? Don’t be mad anymore. I won’t force you to make fried taiji heads anymore. I’ll eat whatever you cook, okay... Li, don’t stay silent. I’m scared.”

Still the same.

Lu Li gave a bleak smile. She didn’t even know why he was disappointed. An Baili had never understood him, never cared for him. Was it really just because of what happened with cooking yesterday? Twenty years ago, he’d thought she would grow gentler, more considerate, more mature. Ten years ago, he’d thought she just needed a little more time.

Now, Lu Li had no hope left at all.

A sentence surfaced in his mind:

Never expect to change someone. You’re not God.

They loved each other deeply. But love wasn’t everything. And now, Lu Li had decided to walk away.

“I’ve thought about this for a long time.” Lu Li finally spoke again.

The moment he opened his mouth, An Baili pressed her lips to his, trying to block his hurtful words with her body. That had always been her way. She was a beautiful woman, and she knew Lu Li couldn’t resist her.

But this time, Lu Li avoided her.

She froze. Then a greater panic swept over her in an instant. She held him even tighter.

“I’m really tired. So tired, so very tired. I don’t want to say another word...” Lu Li’s voice made her feel like she’d fallen into an ice pit. “I’ll leave with nothing. All my wealth, including the company under my name, will be transferred to you.”

“I don’t want your money. I don’t!” An Baili panicked, her voice turning sharp. “Don’t say that. Please, don’t say that, okay...”

The harder she cried, the farther Lu Li turned his head away.

“Why are you doing this... why are you so heartless?” An Baili sobbed until she could barely speak. “If I wanted your money, why would I have gotten together with you back then? I still remember it. We were both broke. At breakfast in the school cafeteria, we’d grab a few extra steamed buns and chew on them at noon. Then we’d just grin at each other like idiots...”

“Stop.” Once people got older, they naturally couldn’t bear hearing old memories brought up, especially at a time like this. Lu Li cut her off. “I wasn’t tolerant enough. It’s not your fault. I’m the one who wronged you. That’s enough. You don’t need to say anything else.”

A middle-aged man’s decision came after deep thought. It wasn’t like youth, changing from morning to night. He decided to give An Baili time to calm down.

“I’m going to sleep in the guest room for a while. Calm down first. If you’ve thought it through, sign it.”

He coldly pried her hands off him, but An Baili clung to him stubbornly. “Let go. I want to rest. I’m very tired today.”

“No!”

He looked at An Baili in silence. The fading love in his eyes filled her with fear. The Lu Li in front of her felt so unfamiliar that it terrified her. She let go instinctively, then regretted it at once.

Lu Li decisively entered the guest room and locked the door, leaving An Baili crying and shouting outside.

The auntie next door called with concern, urging them not to fight. She especially hinted that Lu Li better not be hitting his wife, or she’d call the women’s federation. Lu Li explained a few things, though he didn’t even know what exactly he had explained.

Dazed, he lay down on the bed. Scene after scene from these past years drifted through his mind. Listening to the clock tick away second by second, he finally fell asleep.

He had a dream.

He dreamed of the sweet, sticky romance he’d had with An Baili when they were young. He couldn’t even tell if it counted as a good dream or a nightmare.

He woke because of a foul smell. Not only was the odor strange, the oxygen in the air felt thin too. Breathing came a little hard. Was it because the doors and windows were shut tight and the air wasn’t circulating?

A bad thought flashed through his mind.

He opened the door and saw An Baili sitting in the living room, tears on her face like pear blossoms in rain. In her hand was the divorce agreement, crumpled into a ball.

The doors and windows were all locked. The curtains were drawn too. The whole apartment was dim, and only An Baili’s watery eyes stood out.

That rotten-egg stench was everywhere.

Lu Li looked at her. “What did you do?”

“I want to be with you forever, forever, forever.” She said forever three times. “I love you, Lu Li. You promised me you’d never abandon me for your whole life. You wouldn’t go back on your word, right?”

At last, Lu Li understood what she had done. The guilt in his eyes was replaced by fear and anger.

“Are you insane? An Baili, do you even have a brain?! How old are you, still pulling something like this?!”

He wanted to open the doors and windows, or stop An Baili.

But the lack of oxygen and his exhaustion had numbed his mind. His reactions weren’t as sharp as usual. He failed to notice the lighter in An Baili’s hand right away.

Her tender gaze rested on him.

“I want to make you love me one more time.”

There were no rotten eggs.

Only leaking gas.

And the open flame in An Baili’s hand.

The next second, fire swallowed the husband and wife whole.

*

It was now August 26, 2017, with only a few days left before the start of his second year of high school.

This year, he had just turned sixteen, in the prime of youth, bright and full of spirit. This year, he didn’t need to worry about taking care of his body yet. He could stay up all night online and still sit through a full day of class. He could blast the AC on rainy days. He could drink iced drinks as much as he wanted.

He smiled wildly, freely.

He had actually been reborn. He had returned to the year he was sixteen.

On August 26, he hadn’t even met An Baili yet.

That meant everything still hadn’t happened. He had a chance to choose his life all over again.

And those regrets.

This time, he wouldn’t let them stay regrets.

An Baili’s final madness still made Lu Li’s heart pound. He had never known that someone as timid as her could hide such a demon inside. It also made him deeply grateful that he had made the right judgment.

His phone’s memo app had “buy reference books” written in it, followed by “XXX Chinese study guide, XXX math workbook.” Today, he needed to get ready for the new semester.

Lu Li lived alone. He had no parents, and no relatives either. Though he lived by himself, it wasn’t in some villa. It was a low-rent apartment provided by the government for vulnerable groups like them.

This was the Divine Realm nation on Earth, a constitutional monarchy.

It was also Lu Li’s homeland.

The year was 2017, the most civilized era in history, and also the era with the most developed entertainment industry.

Lu Li had a dream. He wanted to become a game producer.

He liked games, not just video games. He liked setting rules completely different from reality. He liked weaving gameplay that people could lose themselves in. He liked seeing the relaxed, happy smiles on other people’s faces. In his previous life, he had chased that dream the whole way. He had reached a certain height, but it was far from true success.

His gaze swept greedily over everything on the street, trying to confirm through sight and smell that all of this was real.

Standing at his doorway, he happened to run into Zou Yameng, who had just come back from her morning run.

Zou Yameng wore a sports tank top. Sweat gleamed on her delicate skin, and the heavy curve of her chest had once lingered in a boy’s dreams. Before meeting An Baili, he had fantasized more than once about tumbling into bed with Sister Yameng.

All he could say was this: a boy’s fantasies were always outrageous.

This time, he didn’t lower his head shyly. Instead, he looked at her with delight.

“Sister Yameng...!”

Zou Yameng took off her earphones. “Whoa, whoa, whoa. That happy to see me?” Her tone was half teasing, half affectionate.

Zou Yameng was Lu Li’s neighbor. She was also an orphan, with no one to care for her, living on government support. In elementary school, she had shown outstanding athletic talent and was recruited by Chuanghai City Women’s Sports School. She was an excellent youth table tennis player.

At the same time, Zou Yameng was also Lu Li’s childhood friend who had grown up with him. Or rather, half an older sister.

She was a very beautiful woman. She wore her hair short. Her features carried an androgynous beauty, her figure was stunning, and her personality was open and generous. Supposedly, she was very popular at the girls’ school. But this big sister had very little will of her own. Maybe, like Lu Li, she carried an inborn inferiority deep down.

In his previous life, the year after Lu Li married An Baili, Sister Yameng hanged herself.

Back then, she had left the national team because of an Achilles tendon injury. She had turned down a job coaching a youth training team and returned to Chuanghai City. No one knew what she had been thinking then, why she came back, or why she killed herself not long after.

After Sister Yameng died, Lu Li had gone to sort through her place. Only then did he discover the room was full of empty beer bottles and household trash. He had no idea how she had gone from a bright, easygoing athlete to a broken woman who took her own life.

An elder sister was like a mother. Most of the time, it was Zou Yameng taking care of him. She was only a year older than him, but she was extremely reliable, and Lu Li’s way of doing things later in life had been influenced by her to some extent.

“Yeah. I’m happy. Really, really happy to see you, Sister Yameng!” he said instinctively.

It seemed rebirth wasn’t just a simple return of the soul. With his body turned young again, his mindset had grown younger too. Feelings he never would have shown so easily in his previous life slipped out of his mouth without effort.

To be able to see Zou Yameng again, he felt, was already heaven favoring him.

Zou Yameng smiled brightly. “Your mouth’s sweet today. Let me take a shower first. Then I’ll bring you out for breakfast.”

“Okay.”

He looked up at the blue sky. Not a cloud for ten thousand miles. The sky was washed clean.

It was so good to be alive.

It was so good to be young.