Rain hammered the playground in a torrential downpour. Droplets scattered wildly as trees swayed in the gale, their vibrant green leaves a refreshing splash of color.
Sometimes storms felt like the apocalypse. But Lin An loved this kind of rain. He’d often think, *Just pour harder—drown the whole city.*
Su Yuejin was arrogant and willful, yet not unreasonable. She knew that night, she’d been the one to throw herself into his arms. She couldn’t blame him entirely.
But why was it wrong? If he’d added her on WeChat afterward, chatted with her—then it would’ve been “right.” But the story didn’t go that way.
“So why didn’t you want to add me, Lin An?” Su Yuejin spoke his name softly.
“Why did *you* want to add *me*?” Lin An turned, studying her porcelain cheeks, the faint white mist escaping her lips. He’d quit smoking long ago.
He didn’t hate the smell—he just didn’t like girls who smoked.
“Because I said it. I like you.” Her voice was clear, unwavering. Her gaze held his, steady and unflinching.
“Here’s a trick: go home, sleep it off. In two days, your thoughts will cool. You’ll see what you truly want.” Lin An’s tone was flat, his expression calm.
“I don’t add strangers. My circle’s small. It’s messy. Our lives weren’t meant to cross.”
“Are you… still looking down on me?”
“Do I even *have* the standing to look down on you, Su Yuejin? I know how much that bag cost. We’re not from the same world. Taking you for hot pot would cost me weeks of part-time work. You’d barely touch it—and not care if it went to waste.”
“I don’t like girls who go to nightclubs. Not judging—it’s just not for me.”
“I don’t like girls who smoke or dress too revealingly. Yeah, I’m that ‘straight man’ those Weibo feminists rant about. Disrespectful? Restrictive? Maybe. But that’s me. We’re not compatible.”
“And your ‘like’ feels too cheap. I can’t accept it.”
Lin An murmured each word gently, yet they pricked her one by one. She couldn’t refute a single line.
“One last thing—I’m not the gentle, sensible boy you imagine. Never was. Back then, I liked being liked… without responsibility.”
Su Yuejin forced a neutral face, took a sharp drag, coughed twice. Lin An lightly patted her back.
“Were you… in many relationships before?”
Lin An paused. “Ah… yeah.”
(Truth was, barely two. But he had to push her away—afraid his own greed might slip loose.)
“So it wasn’t your first time either?”
“If it were, I’d have hurt you that night, silly girl.” He shrugged, eyes on the rain-lashed world.
She punched his arm. He didn’t flinch. Just sat, waiting for the storm to pass.
“Why so rational?” Su Yuejin murmured, head slightly bowed. In her mind, Lin An’s image was forming—clear yet shrouded in mystery, pulling her curiosity deeper.
“It’s not rational. Girls get anxious after the first time. You’ll calm down. Maybe think, *Just got bitten by a dog.* If it still stings… sorry’s all I’ve got.” Self-mockery edged his voice.
“Why call yourself a dog?”
“You hate me, right? So I’ll play along. But no more hitting—it *hurts*.” He shook his head.
“I don’t hate you that much.”
“Ah? Good.”
“You know more than me.”
“Poor kids grow up fast. Learn quick, or get stepped on.”
“Won’t your parents pick you up?”
“Adoptive parents passed two years ago. I live alone.”
*(Not mentioning the other one was his pact with Xu Qinghuan.)*
Su Yuejin froze. Saw the quiet sorrow in his eyes. “I… I’m sorry.”
“It’s past.”
“You? No call home?”
“They’re busy. ‘Take a taxi.’ But… where’s a taxi now? Guess we wait.” She hugged her knees, pulled up her hoodie. Rabbit ears drooped.
Lin An nodded silently.
Two nights ago, tangled lovers. Now, strangers. As it should be.
*If I hadn’t gone out that night… would I have met her?*
Silence stretched between them.
“Actually… I’m not that bad. Nightclubs? Only a few months. Once a week. Smoking? Started recently.”
“I saw it.”
“How?”
“That place eats girls like you alive—so bright, so naive. One wrong step, a player has you wrapped in hours. You’d hand them the money *and* smile. Until they’re bored.”
“I’m not that…” She trailed off. *Less than four hours with him… and I was in bed.* Her smile turned bitter.
“Yeah! I’ll keep going! First time’s gone—what’s left to lose? At least they’ll sweet-talk me. I *want* to!”
Lin An turned. His hand settled gently on her shoulder. Met her eyes.
Her voice trembled with recklessness.
“Who are you punishing?”
“Does trampling yourself feel *good*?” His calm finally cracked. Emotion raw. “Self-destruction cool? Sleeping around cool? Being ‘popular’ cool?”
“You think you’re skilled? Real players? Mutual game. You? You’re handing yourself over. *Do you like that?*”
“Love degradation? Love being a slut? Then go further! Get a boyfriend, cheat—*thrill of betrayal* even spicier! Enough?”
She raised her hand.
“Hit a nerve? Go on. I don’t lose anything. Love hitting? Try the BDSM scene—plenty of willing guys. *Hit me.*”
*Slap.* His cheek burned red. He didn’t move. Just watched her tear-filled eyes.
“You won’t admit it, but it’s truth. Why hurt yourself? Who’s the target? Lonely? Then *date*. Find someone gentle. Real. Isn’t that better?”
“If someone truly loved me… I’d change.”
“Then think: what does ‘truly loving you’ mean? Your clubbing? Your smoke? What does *that* version attract?”
“Traits draw types. Simple logic. Hard to grasp?”
“Crying now? Did I upset the little miss?” He sighed. He never wanted this. Others’ lives weren’t his burden. Preach too much, and you’re just noise.
“Besides bullying me, what *can* you do?!” Tears spilled. Voice petulant.
“Bullying? I’m stating facts. Should I say, ‘You club, smoke, drink daily—but you’re still a good girl’?”
“Want that? Need encouragement? Ruined your ‘fall’ plan? *So sorry.*” Sarcasm dripped.
She cried harder. *He’s right… but it hurts.* “Pretending to be good? My brother? My teacher? *You* slept with me! I seduced you—couldn’t you have held back?!”
“…”
“It’s *my* fault for being naive. For believing someone would come… teach me, grow with me. That hope? That’s what makes you lovely. Worth waiting for.”
“But you haven’t met them yet. Why rush to break yourself? If it’s because of me… I won’t let it continue. So I spoke up. I wanted to… look out for you.”
“Who are you to look out for me?!”
Tears fell, but she pulled him close—foreheads touching, breath warm on his skin. Through tears, she smiled.
“Then *be* my boyfriend. Let you look out for me.”
Lin An held her gaze. Felt her breath.
“I have a girlfriend.”
She stilled. Then hugged him tighter. Her soft lips neared his.
“Break up with her. Choose me.”
Her voice held unshakable insistence—suddenly, the spoiled girl-next-door, demanding her way.
Lin An wondered: *If I nod… would she give me candy?*
