Alan was desperate. Why did he keep running into such people? His dad and grandpa were jerks. Now Haina had become one too. She even offered a sky-high breach fee—500,000 gold coins—just to trap him. He was exhausted. Alan figured this life’s mess must be because he’d screwed up his reincarnation pose. Otherwise, how could this happen?

“Alan, will you take this commission or pay that insane breach fee?” Haina asked. “Don’t rush. Think it over. I’m not in a hurry. Really.”

Haina leaned on the bar, chin propped on her hands, confident of victory. Once she got rid of Alan, that vixen Medi would be at her mercy.

Medi waited gleefully for Alan to snap. One minute passed. Two. Five. All she saw was Alan’s desperate face. Desperate? Why? Haina had tricked him—he should be furious. Why despair?

Medi didn’t understand. Her enchanting eyes filled with confusion. Was he reluctant? Reluctant to yell at that blue-haired mistress?

That thought ignited Medi’s rage. Alan’s favoritism was blatant. Did he even care about her, his fiancée?

“When will Fate, Gioni, and Ximing return?” Alan asked weakly. They were S Rank Mages in Cloud Peak Guild. Gone nearly a month. If any were here, this Bipedal Wyvern exploration commission could go to them.

“Alan, I know what you’re thinking,” Haina said. “Sadly, they won’t be back soon. The client leaves for Degenas Mountains in three days. You’ll leave the guild then. Don’t worry—I’ll manage it after you’re gone. As for certain vixens? I’ll only guarantee she won’t starve.” She shot Medi a cold snort.

“Can’t you two just coexist?” Alan sighed. “Why always clash? What grudge is this?”

“She stole my man!” Both women shouted in unison. Realizing their identical words, they glared.

“Shameless mistress! Alan is mine. You won’t take him!” Medi’s eyes turned icy. Dark flames surged around her.

“Vixen! I raised Alan since childhood. Steal him? See if you’ve got the skill!” Haina’s eyes flickered with inner fire. A crimson glow enveloped her body.

Guild members scrambled from the bar. They huddled in corners, munching sunflower seeds, sipping juice, happily watching the catfight. Mediating? No way. They might get dragged in. Better to enjoy the show.

“Truly the youngest guild president ever. That charm’s unstoppable.” Blond Halway twirled his earring, legs crossed, teasing Alan.

“Sigh, when will this single dog find love? I’m not greedy—just three girls. When they argue, I’ll calm them with mahjong.” Dass eyed Alan enviously. Twenty years single—he was done with solo handiwork.

Pfft!

Eli Gao, across from Dass, spat out his wine. “Cough… Dass… you weren’t joking? I recall you liking men. Now it’s women?”

“Get lost! You like men! Your whole family does! I’m straight! Straight!”

“Pfft! Straight my ass! Last bathroom break, I saw you were bent!” Halway dropped his hand from his earring, glaring at the liar.

“……”

Nearby guild members fell silent. Discuss this privately! Why shout in public? Still, juicy info.

“You bastards, watch it! Minors are here. Next time you’re this reckless, I’ll purify your filthy minds with Light Magic!” Alan stood, glaring at the trio. Didn’t they see Sia and Emma? What if they corrupted those pure hearts?

No dirty jokes out of context. Drag them out and beat them.

“Youngest president ever—you’re one of us. Remember when you used to peep at… mmmph!” Halway’s mouth sealed shut by Alan’s magic. “Sit quietly there.”

Halway jabbed his finger at his lips. Unlock my mouth if you want quiet!!! he screamed inwardly.

Alan ignored him. Haina and Medi reined in their auras. Fighting before Alan was unwise. After he left… just wait, you hussy.

Both women thought this silently.

Seeing their hostility fade, Alan sighed in relief. Good—no fight.

“Brother Alan, I’m hungry.” Sia tilted her head up at him.

Alan ruffled her hair. “Hungry? Eat. What for dinner?”

“Roast meat, red-braised pork, Dongpo pork, egg drop soup, mapo tofu, shredded potatoes… and so on.” Sia listed every dish she knew. Forgotten items? None—she’d added “and so on,” right?

Alan recalled Sia’s terrifying appetite. She ate as much as Emma. Oh no—this would bankrupt him.

He couldn’t even feed his sister. How afford a fiancée? Might as well sell her off.

Ah, just a thought. Doing it would get him killed. Maybe become a pampered kept man instead.

“Alan, we’re staying for dinner too. Cook extra. I’ll buy baijiu.” Eli Gao grinned beside him.

“No freeloaders welcome. Leave if you’re one.”

Eli Gao turned. “Halway, be considerate. Stop making Alan scold you.”

Halway: “Mmm… mmm mmm…”

Three hours later, a bonfire crackled in Cloud Peak Guild’s backyard. Meat sizzled, laughter filled the air. Only Alan grilled endlessly—grill, grill, grill.

I shouldn’t be guild president. I should be a damn chef. You beasts—drinking big bowls, devouring meat, howling—do you remember I’m your president?