Autumn Ease was certain he must’ve committed some unforgivable sin in his past life. Otherwise, why was he cursed with such rotten luck in this one?

Not only had he stumbled into all these bizarre situations, but he didn’t even have a girlfriend…

Ah, no—scratch that. His life was literally on the line right now.

He couldn’t see it, but he knew without a doubt the cold metal pressed against his temple was a gun.

Logically, he knew his captor wouldn’t kill him—they needed him alive to escape. But what if the gun misfired? What if some accident happened?

Worse, the hand holding the gun trembled slightly. Autumn Ease couldn’t shake the fear that the trigger might slip at any second.

*If I survive this,* he silently vowed, *I’ll turn over a new leaf! I’ll even help old ladies cross the street!*

Tension thickened the air until it felt suffocating.

“Drop your weapon. We’ll let you walk away,” a calm voice called out.

“Impossible! You lower yours first—and escort us out. Or I kill him!”

“You can’t take him. But we guarantee your safe exit.”

“Shut up! Back off!” The captor’s shout cracked with rage, the gun shaking more violently. “Or I pull this trigger!”

“Stay calm—”

“Get back—*urk*—”

Before Autumn Ease could process the sound, a coppery liquid splattered his face. He was slammed to the ground.

*Whoosh—!*

The sonic crack of a sniper round finally reached his ears. Then—

***BANG!***

A pistol’s misfire. If he hadn’t been tackled, his head would’ve been mashed watermelon.

The blindfold ripped off. The duct tape tore from his mouth—

“*Damn it!* Ow, ow, ow—!” He winced, stubble ripped raw from his chin.

Rescuers moved fast. Knives sliced his ropes in under thirty seconds. Without hostages, the remaining thugs crumpled against trained soldiers.

Autumn Ease exhaled shakily, pushing himself upright. He squinted at the armed figures. Not a military buff, he only recognized the rifle-like weapons and high-tech combat suits—definitely top-tier gear.

“Mr. Autumn Ease?” A man stepped forward, hand extended. “Special Ops, Third Unit. Captain Huang Gou. *Gou* as in wolfberry.”

Autumn Ease recognized the voice—the negotiator from earlier.

*Huang Gou?*

He shook the offered hand, eyebrows lifting. *Seriously?* The captain’s dead-serious expression made him bite back a laugh.

“C-Captain Huang. Pleasure.”

“We apologize for the intrusion,” Huang said earnestly. “But certain matters require your involvement.”

“Uh… no problem.” Autumn Ease glanced around. “So… you’ll take me home after this?”

*Yeah, right.* He was just testing the waters.

“We’ll escort you home. But first—Dr. Ji requests your presence at the institute.”

Autumn Ease’s real worry: *Will they “protect” me by stalking my every move?* Safety was nice, but constant surveillance? No thanks.

“Right. Let’s go, then?” He forced a smile, eyes darting to the darkening sky. *Too late to ask for a rain check…*

These guys were polite now—but who knew what “polite” really meant? Survival instinct kicked in. He’d play along.

First time in a military vehicle. He’d dodged conscription years ago—faking worse eyesight during exams with borrowed thick-rimmed glasses. *Glorious service?* He’d always scoffed at the idea. Army life meant politics, power plays, officers crushing subordinates. *One misstep and you’re executed.* He’d hide in the mountains during war. *Alive beats dead. Always.*

He didn’t dare touch anything in the armored truck. *Curiosity kills civilians.*

“Don’t be afraid, Mr. Autumn Ease,” Captain Huang said from the driver’s seat. “We’re here to protect you.”

“Oh, it’s just… soldiers command respect!” Autumn Ease lied smoothly. “I’ve always admired the military! Wanted to enlist, serve the nation—but failed the physical. Such a shame.”

Flattery cost nothing. He’d mastered talking to humans, ghosts, or anyone in between.

“Ha! With your unique abilities, you could still join as a specialist. There might be battles ahead—”

“No, no!” Autumn Ease waved his hands. “I’m practically ancient! Twenty-six—almost thirty! No girlfriend, no time for soldiering. I’d die single!” He chuckled dryly. *Praising the army is easy. Actually joining? Hard pass.*

The institute hid near Hangzhou’s outskirts, disguised as a landfill at a mountain’s base. Inside, the tunnel revealed a sci-fi labyrinth. *Is this whole mountain hollowed out?*

“Does this place have a name?” Autumn Ease asked.

“Zhuangzi Institute. Officially, it’s the Spatial Vibration Frequency Distortion—”

“Whoa, skip the mouthful.” Autumn Ease rubbed his temples. “Where’s the doctor?”

“Almost there. Elevator down. Dr. Ji is our director—and he’s waiting.”

The elevator descended in twisting turns. When the doors slid open, a girl in a frilly dress stood waiting—eighteen, maybe, with a face naggingly familiar.

*That’s… Dr. Ji?* Autumn Ease’s hopes soared. *Hot genius scientist!*

Huang’s sigh crushed the fantasy. “No, that’s—”

“Autumn Ease! I’m Dr. Ji.” A white-haired man in a crisp suit stepped forward, hand outstretched. “Call me Uncle Ji. This is my granddaughter, Ji Yingying.”

“*YOU PERVERT—!*” The girl’s eyes widened like saucers. “*You’re* Autumn Ease?!”

“Huh?” His fake smile froze. “What did I—?”

“Grandpa! It’s him! That night I called you—he lifted my skirt in the bar!”

White-coated staff turned heads. Captain Huang’s eye twitched.

*He did what?!*

“Ahem, Yingying, you must be mistaken—”

“I’d *never* forget that face!”

Autumn Ease stared, memory flashing. “Wait—you’re the girl from the bar! Drunk, dragged into the woods by creeps—I *saved* you!”

“You’re lying! My hero’s name is Guan Peng! And how do you even *know* that?!” Her brows knotted. “Were you *stalking* me?!”

*I was framed!*