Under the bridge, by the riverside, far from the main road—this was Yumo’s sanctuary.

After dragging Liyu out of school, he’d instinctively come here. Survival instinct, maybe?

"Um, Yumo... what you just said... was it true?" Liyu stammered.

"Can you exercise after getting stitches?"

"Uh? The doctor said it’s fine..."

"Then run a lap first."

"...Huh?"

"See the riverside path? Run to the end and back—it’s about a kilometer. Go run, then we’ll talk."

"Why??"

"You’re all mixed up, right? Running clears the head."

"O-okay..."

Utterly confused, Liyu panted off down the path.

Yumo plopped onto the grass, facepalming with a sigh. "I actually did it... damn."

And the reply came—

"Mmm-hmm-hmm... Pfft... Hahaha!!!"

—Yusuozaai, laughing uncontrollably.

Her laughter—sharp, erratic, and ear-splitting—shattered her usual "poor yet elegant" aura.

"You’ve got guts. Should I call you Otto Carius II? Mmm-hmm-hmm!"

"Are you mocking me or her?"

"Oh, you know the meme?"

"I’ve read plenty about WWII history!"

Fed up, Yumo kicked Yusuozaai’s butt. She tumbled down the embankment—but no splash. Like a video game glitch, she phased through the river’s surface, winking before vanishing.

"Stupid Demon. All sarcasm, no help..."

"I just provide the push."

Yusuozaai reappeared from behind, patting his shoulder. "I get it. Since you need a girlfriend ASAP, why not pick Liyu? Timid, soft-hearted, won’t say no. And you did it publicly—almost like forcing her hand. Remember what I said? ‘How do you know you can’t be a scumbag unless you try?’ Well, looks like we have our answer."

"Call me whatever. At least this fulfills one wish—"

"But she’s not as cute as me."

"...Huh?"

Yusuozaai poked Yumo’s nose, grinning eerily. "Check your wish list again. It’s not just ‘get a girlfriend.’ She has to be pretty. Cute. You set strict conditions for every detail."

"Liyu’s cute, isn’t she?"

"Objectively or subjectively, do you really think she’s cute? Forget your preferences—first, is she even a pretty girl?"

"...What about ‘plump is beautiful,’ like in the Tang Dynasty?"

"The Tang ideal was full-figured and graceful. You don’t think Yang Yuhuan was just a chubby girl, do you?"

"Uh..."

"Don’t accuse me of body-shaming. Ask yourself: does she fit your strike zone? And her timid, insecure personality—is that ‘beautiful inside’?"

Yumo fell silent. Reluctantly, he admitted she was right. No matter how he lied to himself, Liyu couldn’t compare to the girls in his daydreams.

But—

"So I confessed to lock her in. Her looks... can be fixed."

"That’s the spirit. Embrace your inner scumbag. Focus on the result, not the means."

Yusuozaai poked his face. He swatted her hand away.

Just then, Liyu returned, panting and sweaty. Yumo checked his watch—faster than expected.

"Not bad stamina for someone plump. Good constitution. Hey, Liyu! Good job!"

"So... why... make me run... a kilometer..."

"But you’re calmer now, right?"

"Yeah... calmer..."

Post-run, Liyu had cooled down. But calmness brought back her usual pessimism.

Facing his first girlfriend, Yumo was calmer than expected. Liyu, however, had swung from deepest despair to sudden bliss in under 24 hours. The shock made her fearful.

"Why me? I... I do like you, but—ah, I said it! Anyway, I... I shouldn’t..."

"Stop stuttering. If you want to reject me, just say it."

"I’d never reject this! It’s too good..."

"Then what’s the problem?"

"I’m not good enough! I know it!!" Liyu cried desperately. "I’m fat, timid, average grades, poor family, no talents... What could you possibly like about me? Are you just pitying me? Or forced to do this? If so... if..."

Her voice faded. She hung her head, miserable.

Yumo inwardly winced. (Women’s intuition? She guessed right. Damn. Well then—)

"Then lose weight."

"Lose—what?"

"If you hate your looks, change them. Try dieting. I’ll join you. Honestly, your features are nice, skin’s good—you’ll look great slimmed down. Confidence comes with beauty."

He meant it. He locked eyes with Liyu, pouring absolute sincerity into his gaze. She blushed, avoiding his stare.

"I... can’t lose weight..."

"Tried before?"

"Many times, but always—"

"Diet control? Exercise? Professional guidance? Did you stick to it?"

"Longest... one week?"

"Oh, impressive."

"..."

"..."

"...Okay, sorry. I never really tried."

"Let’s try together. I need exercise too."

"You know about dieting? You’re so slim!"

"Never dieted, but I know someone who does."

Thinking of that person made Yumo uneasy, but worth a shot.

"My mother—well, stepmother—is a certified fitness coach and nutritionist. I’ll ask her to guide you. If it works, be my girlfriend with pride."

"...Promise?"

"Promise. A man’s word is his bond."

Yumo solemnly took Liyu’s hand. First time holding a girl’s hand outside family.

For a second, he thought of his cousin. Nausea rose, but he swallowed it down. Maybe Liyu’s warm, soft palm calmed him.

——————————

Home by noon, alone. Yumo needed to vent. His mind was bursting.

Perfect timing—

【Good evening】

【Faust? You’re back! Your avatar was gray for days.】

Shenxianbi messaged, sounding worried.

【Busy with personal stuff.】

【Trouble? School or family?】

【Complicated, but okay now.】

【We rarely chat offline, but if something’s wrong, tell me (´-ω-`)】

【I got a girlfriend.】

Yumo typed it impulsively. Shenxianbi would congratulate him, joke around...

Silence.

Maybe bathroom break? Yumo did homework, watched lectures. Hours later—still no reply.

"What the...? Ah!"

Two legs clad in open-toe socks suddenly wrapped around his shoulders from behind.

"Get off, stupid Demon."

Yumo glared back. His tiny room had the chair almost touching the bed. Yusuozaai lounged there, reading, legs draped over his shoulders.

"Put them down."

"This is comfy. Don’t be stingy."

"It’s tiring!"

"Feel of a maiden’s thighs! I feel guilty freeloading, so consider it a perk."

"Your legs are too skinny... Wish I could transfer Liyu’s fat to you."

"You just did something big."

Yusuozaai pointed at his phone. He paused.

"Don’t tell me my online friend is the class beauty, a star, a rich widow crushing on me?"

"Worse."

"...You’re joking, right?"

*Ding.* A notification.

【Sorry for the delay! Got pulled into a meeting. Congrats!】

"See? Normal reply. Just late." Yumo sighed in relief.

"If you say so. By the way, your gorgeous stepmom’s coming back. Ready to ask her?"

"No problem."

"How?"

"Be polite. Flatter her. Tell a story to lighten the mood. Make her happy, and she’ll agree."