We headed straight to the cafeteria, bought our meals, and sat down—Wanrou and Ting on one side of the table, me alone on the other. Xu Wanrou finally got to the point, her voice low: "Tongtong, your sect practices *qigong*, right? Last time we fought, I saw it clearly—you never even touched that creepy coach’s ‘down there,’ yet he was howling in pain. Ancient martial arts really are incredible!"
Trapped, I had no choice but to double down on my "ancient martial arts heir" act. "No other way. That creep actually knew some real moves. I was forced to use my inner energy."
"Ancient martial arts? Inner energy?" Gu Yanting looked utterly lost, like we were spinning fairy tales. "Are you two… making this up?"
"Pfft! Of course not!" Wanrou beamed. "Tingting, let me properly introduce you: Tongtong here is the successor of a mysterious ancient martial arts sect! Remember when those thugs tried to harass Chen Jiayi? She stepped in, punched one flying, and sent the whole lot scrambling on their knees, begging for mercy!"
"Too kind, too kind…" I mumbled, my humility purely born of panic.
Yanting eyed me up and down, still skeptical. "Him? So short and skinny—where’s he getting that kind of strength?"
"Short?" Wanrou blinked, confused. "When we went shopping last time, I noticed—he’s about my height. 167, maybe 168 cm. That’s not short at all."
"Not short? He’s practically the shortest guy in our class!"
"Guy? Pfft, Tingting, you’ve got it all wrong—Tongtong is—"
"*COUGH-COUGH-COUGH-COUGH!*"
I cut her off with a violent coughing fit. Wanrou caught on fast, sticking out her tongue at me secretly. A chill ran down my spine. It was only a matter of time before my cross-dressing secret spread across the whole school. To stop this blabbermouth from spilling more, I jumped in: "Sister Wanrou, didn’t you say you needed something?"
"Need something? Oh right!" Her eyes lit up. "That Taekwondo creep’s started harassing my sister again. Guess last time wasn’t enough of a lesson. Since you know *qigong*, next match—don’t hold back. Just… disable his ‘down there.’ Make him take vows of celibacy."
*Women really can be ruthless*, I thought, a phantom ache flaring in my own groin. I’d faced pro fighters before—that coach’s kick still gave me headaches. No way was I agreeing to this. "Sister Wanrou… our sect stays hidden. We never show off. Last time I broke the rules, the elders punished me severely. If I do it again… the Sect Leader will strip my martial arts away himself."
"Eh? That’s brutal!"
"Don’t say that… the Sect Leader has his reasons…"
Yanting stared at us, utterly bewildered. "Wanrou, are you being scammed by this kid? Ancient sects? Sect Leaders? Did you binge too many wuxia dramas?"
Wanrou’s smile vanished. Her voice turned icy. "Tingting. We’ve been best friends for years, but I won’t let you insult Tongtong. Do you have any idea how hard it’s been for her? To inherit her master’s legacy, she had to cross-dress—"
"*COUGH-COUGH-COUGH-COUGH-COUGH!*"
Lunch ended with me dreading the rest of my high school life.
Back in class, He Wei burst in, panting, three milk teas clutched to his chest. He set them on Wanrou’s desk like an offering. "Goddess Wanrou, I—"
"Dismissed." She waved him off impatiently. She handed one tea to Yanting, then brought the other to me, her face shifting to a pleading smile. "Tongtong, think it over? We could make the match super discreet. Your sect would never find out."
I sighed dramatically, feigning inner turmoil. "Sister Wanrou… I truly want to help. But my hands are tied. Please understand."
Wanrou puffed out her cheeks, annoyed—then her eyes sparkled with a new idea. "Tongtong, are you free tonight? My sister wants to treat you to dinner. To thank you for last time. Just at Seafood Tower nearby. Won’t take much of your time!"
Seafood Tower was a decent mid-range spot about four kilometers from school. Not too pricey, great reviews. I’d eaten there last Chinese New Year with my parents and their colleagues. Honestly, I was tired of takeout. And Xu Wanqing’s black-stockinged legs had haunted my dreams. I agreed instantly.
The moment Wanrou left, He Wei pounced from behind, locking me in a rear-naked choke. His voice dripped with menace. "Wu. Confess. What’s *really* going on between you and my goddess?"
*Hey! Easy, Hippo! You’re actually choking me to death?! Five years of brotherhood—gone over a girl? This hurts!*
Blind with love, Hippo tightened his grip. Gasping, I choked out: "Just… friends! Ask her yourself!"
"*Sister Wanrou*? Since when do *you* get to call her that?!" His eyes blazed. His arms squeezed harder.
Luckily, Wanrou spotted us. She sprinted over, jabbing a finger at Hippo. "He Wei! Let go! Don’t you know Tongtong’s a *girl*? How dare you manhandle her like that!"
*No. No no no.* My world went gray. Wanrou clapped a hand over her mouth, shooting me an apologetic tongue-flick.
*If a cute pout could fix this, we wouldn’t need police!*
The lunchtime chatter died around us. Our classmates stared, then burst into laughter:
"Hahaha! Wu Tong a *girl*? Class flower, you killing me!"
"Seriously! We were in middle school together. If he’s a girl, I’m a mermaid!"
"Xu, trying to lighten the mood? Clever!"
"... ..."
*Phew.* Crisis averted. Wanrou played along, giggling nervously. "Hehe… just a joke! Tongtong’s totally a guy, hehe…"
Only He Wei stayed silent. He leaned close to my neck, sniffed the air once, twice—and fell deep in thought.
