I swept aside the wet hair plastered to my face. My thin dress was soaked and clung tight. It felt super uncomfortable. But to Lott, it probably looked different. The wet fabric traced my small body perfectly, a real-life wet look. Tempting. Almost mouthwatering. My legs were trapped by the drenched long skirt, so I could only sprawl on him like a mermaid.

It must look pretty lewd. The dark color at least kept things from showing through. Still, calling it “tempting enough to commit a crime” wouldn’t be wrong. But this guy… He’s not actually into a tiny loli, right? Seriously—what a scumbag.

“You’re… reacting because of this?” I asked, still clinging to hope about his character. I leaned down to press closer, trying to reduce exposed area. But I felt his heartbeat spike again. So much for that… Damn it, I’ve never been this intimate with anyone!

“At least have some self-awareness about a body that’s already starting to develop!” he cried in helpless lament, groaning in “pain.”

“But your reaction is exactly what a scumbag would do,” my voice dropped.

His voice shook. He muttered, “It’s over, she’s evolving into a yandere.”

“Scumbag, pervert, shut-in otaku, lolicon!” My fur stood up at once. Yandere, my butt! I raised my hand. “Believe it? I’ll yank that thing off like pulling a radish—biu!”

“No, no! Auntie, please stop!” He threw one hand up in surrender and grabbed my raised arm with the other.

“Who’s the auntie! Do I look that old?!” With my wrist caught, I bent down and bit his pec. He let out a scream like a slaughtered pig.

Was it really that painful? “Um… are you okay?” I let go and asked, testing. I even checked. Aside from a bit of saliva, there were no marks at all.

Did I not bite hard enough?

“Heh, it’s fine. I’m a Hero. How could I lose to the Dark Lord’s little mouth?” he said with a cheeky grin.

Gross! One more bite!

“Aow!”

Bang, bang, bang! After three polite knocks, the door opened. Clock stood there, face blank. And then… the three of us held that pose for a full five seconds.

The mood was painfully weird.

“Sorry, carry on.” Slam. Clock shut the door so hard I wondered if he flattened his own nose.

“Hey, hey, you’ve got it wrong!” Why do I have to hit these random awkward scenes too!

Through the door came Clock’s muffled voice, like he was speaking from a drum: “Your Majesty the Demon King, I don’t object to this sort of thing. I just came to warn you. The officers seem to be searching. Be careful—They’re knocking now. I’ll go open up.”

Hey, how can you abandon Your Majesty in an emergency! Open the door? What the heck! Close it! Keep them out!

I looked around. The bathroom was bare. Plenty of racks, but none could hide a person. Fight them? This is the Royal Capital. Forget “silent takedown.” Even if we succeed, they’ll notice the missing searchers. We’d be trapped.

“Can you use breath-holding magic?” Lott asked suddenly.

I nodded hard. Footsteps were racing up outside. A whole squad was charging upstairs.

“Hide underwater. I’ll cover you up here,” Lott said.

“What about you?!”

“Battle Aura disguise art. Not as miraculous as a magic disguise, but it can tweak face shape and some details.”

Why didn’t you use that earlier? Though, yeah, it wouldn’t have helped much. Before I could react, he flipped me and pushed me under. A big string of bubbles rose.

Idiot! I haven’t cast the breath-holding yet! With weak flow, it needs chanting!

But there was no time. The door was booted open, slammed into the wall, and groaned like it was falling apart. Several Royal Guards stood at the entrance, voices loud and vicious: “Search!”

And then they saw a scene they’d never forget. A handsome youth half-reclined in the pool, body bared, mist curling up in soft veils. His evenly toned, aesthetically perfect muscles were outlined by the light. The build was balanced—neither sharp, explosive mass nor flat, fragile softness. Water beads slid, fell into the pool. Tempting. Mouthwatering.

As if to frame the picture, the water’s surface under the light danced with silver threads, circling the boy like holy glow.

Don’t freeze up… This kitty… this lady is about to suffocate…

The youth held a sultry pose—one hand propping his head, the other index finger under his chin. He watched the soldiers with bored interest.

The key point? The Royal Guards also saw an indescribable something swaying freely.

“Search… Any suspicious persons…”

Search my big head! The suspicious person is drowning! Cough!

“Do I look suspicious to you?” Lott asked, using that special, honeyed timbre unique to beautiful men, drawing out every syllable.

“Cough. We’re here on official business. Have you seen anyone suspicious lately, especially a white-haired little girl?” The man in a different uniform—probably the captain—pushed down a bad premonition and asked solemnly.

“Nope… though I find you guys more suspicious~ How about…”

How about your head… I can’t hold out… Goodbye… Dad… Mom… I… (eyes rolling white)

Lott pressed down the bubbles creeping up and stared at them with a look full of expectation.

“Since you haven’t, we’ll be going.” The captain was still very suspicious, eyes roaming. His gut said there was something off here.

“Wait, gentlemen, could you pick up the soap over there for me?” The youth flashed teeth white as snow.

“Sorry for the disturbance!” Bang! The door took another heavy hit. A crack etched the glass, bearing witness to shared pain.

Only after the footsteps faded completely did Lott sigh and step aside. “All right. You can come up.”

Float.

A “corpse” of a white-haired loli floated to the surface.

“Hey, hey! You okay?!” Lott hurriedly scooped up the “corpse.”

“Fi…fine…” The loli spat out a mouthful of water. Her eyes rolled back. She fainted.