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Chapter 15: This Is No Laughing Matter
update icon Updated at 2025/12/20 17:30:02

I stood frozen in place, staring at the half-open library doors, my heart tangled in inexplicable emotions.

What’s wrong with me?

Was it sympathy after seeing a girl cry…? I couldn’t figure it out.

Teacher Yang had somehow appeared beside me, gazing at the library entrance with the same bewildered fascination. "Master," she clicked her tongue, "what did you *do*? You actually made Bai Yuhui cry… That stubborn girl *weeping*? Unbelievable."

"I didn’t do anything! Wait—why are you calling me ‘Master’?!"

She ignored my question, shuddering again before clutching her forehead. "Ugh…! And stop calling me ‘Teacher’!"

"Huh?"

After pinching the bridge of her nose to recover, she fixed me with a sharp look. "I’ve been wondering… Master, you’re not actually… ordinary, are you?"

"What do you mean ‘not actually’? Correct that! That’s incredibly rude! If you must know who An Juncheng is—"

"Oh? Then…"

"—I’m completely, utterly ordinary!"

"Hah… Look at my face. *This* is my expression."

Teacher Yang deflated like a punctured balloon, rolling her eyes as her lips drooped into a look of utter disgust.

Hey! Are you looking down on ordinary people?! Let me tell you—this world is built by ordinary folks! Ninety-eight percent of humanity is ordinary!

This time, she readily believed me, stroking her chin as she muttered. "But… how did you learn my true name? Only my mother knows it… She’d never reveal it. How could you possibly know? Can you read minds? No, ordinary mind-reading shouldn’t work on us… And you don’t have a trace of magic in you."

"Huuuuh…?"

I stared blankly at Teacher Yang, dragging out the sound. It wasn’t that I didn’t understand her words—it was that my entire worldview, carefully built over eighteen years, had just suffered its *second* catastrophic collapse…

Mind-reading?

Magic?

Do such unscientific things really exist?

I wanted to deny these reality-shattering concepts, but Teacher Yang’s pointed ears and horns made self-deception impossible. Those names and titles I’d seen… were they all… *real*…?

The horrifying truth turned my blood to ice.

The things I’d dismissed as delusions or psychosis were now confirmed—and I stood utterly lost.

"So… if you’re truly ordinary, Master, how did you know my name?"

"I… I don’t know anything…"

I hate not understanding things! Stop shattering my common sense!

"Don’t joke! How could you *not* know?! You saw through my illusion, recognized my true form, and spoke my true name! And now you claim ignorance? Look at me—how can you *still* say you don’t know?! Tell me—what do you see when you look at me now?"

"Uh… Succubus?"

"You *do* know!"

I’d only read the title aloud… I never thought it was *real*…

Teacher Yang… was truly a Succubus.

Which meant every other title I’d seen was likely real too.

Building on that truth, everything changed: Teacher Xiaozhen really was a clone; Jilianbing truly had a corpse-loving murder fetish; my classmates were genuinely a circus of freaks. And most importantly…

My little sisters… were *real* "brocon" maniacs.

I—!

I clutched my head, holding a hand out to create distance. "Wait. My mind’s a mess. Let me… process this."

From what Teacher Yang said, speaking her "true name" had forged some kind of contract between us.

Right—Western fantasy novels often had demons obeying masters who knew their true names. So as a Succubus, she must share that trait.

"So… because I spoke your true name, I became your master?"

"Exactly. You spoke it in my presence, and I heard it. The contract activated. That headache you felt earlier? That was the contract forming. But because our mental strengths were so mismatched, it forced a balance—compensating the weaker side…"

"Forced balance?"

"Yes. It tore a piece of *my* mental energy and grafted it onto yours. Normally, only the stronger side can dominate the weaker using a true name. Even if you knew my name, the contract shouldn’t have worked… Yet it did. And it split my mental energy *in half* to give to you… Wahhh…"

Her voice cracked. Tears streamed down her face again.

Why was she crying *again*?! Come on, you’re a teacher! Is this really appropriate in front of a student?!

"Wait, stop crying! How do I give your mental energy back?"

"...You’d give it back?"

"Of course! I never wanted to take anything from you!"

Wiping her tears with a finger, she sniffled. "Snnk… Our minds are now linked—indivisible. Even if you wanted to return it, you couldn’t. The contract only breaks when you die… then my energy would return. Are you willing to die for me?"

"Uh… that’s a bit difficult…"

"So… until you die, I’m your servant. Oh—and call me Lili from now on. Or Lilith. That’s my real name."

"So… Teacher Lili?"

"Mmhm… NO! Don’t call me ‘Teacher’!"

"Huh?"

Why did just saying "Teacher" make her blush crimson and squeak like that…?

"As your servant, you can’t use honorifics like ‘Teacher’ for me. Every time you do, I suffer… penalties. Just use my name. Start now—even in your thoughts! Habit will fix it."

"O-okay… Yang Te—!"

I nodded seriously, nearly slipping again.

A sharp glare made me correct myself mid-word.

"Ahem. Got it. Lili."

Habits are terrifying… I really need to retrain my thoughts to call her Lili. For her sake—and to avoid those "unmentionable penalties"—I’d better adapt fast.

"Don’t ever reveal my true name to others! Even bound to you, if others learn it, my power weakens… I could be cursed! Promise you’ll never tell!"

"Don’t worry! I swear—I’ll never tell a soul! Not even if my lips were ripped off!"

"And if you ever demand… *lewd* things from me, I’ll trigger backlash and take you with me—GYAAAHHH!"

Before she finished, Yang—no, *Lili*—convulsed violently like she was having a fit. She collapsed to the floor with a *thud*, curling up as her body trembled.

"...Sob… Even threats are forbidden now… Hah… hah…"

Lili lay slumped sideways over a desk, gasping for air. Her chest heaved under the light, sweat glistening on her brow. The flush hadn’t faded from her cheeks; her half-lidded eyes were dazed, a thin strand of drool tracing her lips…

Whoa… so lewd…

How is she… wow…

Is this a Succubus’s power…?

I forced my gaze away, flustered. "I just swore an oath, remember? Relax—I won’t do anything to you."

"Right… You swore. Break it, and you’ll explode…"

"Huh? I’ll *explode*?!"

"Of course! Your ‘oath’ is enforced by the ‘contract’!"

That’s dangerous. Good thing I only said "explode." If I’d said "struck by heavenly lightning," I’d be dead on the spot. Wait—explosion’s pretty bad too!

Whatever. I genuinely have no intention of being a creep. Hmph. An oath like that barely scratches a gentleman like me!

"Then you don’t need to be so wary of me."

Pressing a hand to her chest, Lili visibly relaxed. "Mm. Thank you… Master."

"Listen, Yang—I mean, *Lili*—can you stop calling me ‘Master’? We’re still teacher and student…"

Do I have to be called "Master" forever?

I’ve always wanted maids to call me that, but a *teacher*…? Ugh. Too weird.

"I don’t *want* to call you Master! But the contract forces honorifics."

Ah. But "Master" is awful. Isn’t there an alternative? Another respectful title…?

"Hmm… Got it. Try calling me ‘Master Cheng’ instead."

I recalled how Jilianbing had once reversed my name on a whim.

"Jun" can be an honorific too—so "Master Cheng" should work.

"Master Cheng… Ah. It works."

Lili tested the name. No punishment came, no lewd sounds—this title seemed safely within bounds.

Having my name reversed stung a little, but it beat "Master."

Imagine running into Lili in the school hallway, her habitually shouting "MASTER!"… That scene would be *too* picturesque. By tomorrow, rumors of a "degenerate student training his female teacher" would spread like wildfire.

"Anyway, Lili—just call me Master Cheng."

With the naming crisis resolved, I turned to my real questions.

I tilted my head left, puzzled. "So, Lili… what’s your story?"

She mirrored me, tilting her head right. "Hm? What story?"

I shifted my tilt right, pressing further. "I mean… why is a *Succubus* working at a school?"

She mimicked my motion perfectly. "Why? I’m a teacher here…"

"...I mean, why is a *Succubus* working as a *teacher*?!"

"I graduated from Normal University. Of course I became a teacher."

"Why are your answers so *normal*?! You’re a Succubus!"

Shouldn’t this be more… magical?! Why answer so mundanely all of a sudden?!

"I *am* a Succubus. But it’s no big deal… Like the difference between Caucasians and Asians. Just… slightly different from you humans. No need to make a fuss."

"……"

Was *I* overreacting?!

Succubi are just… a special ethnicity?!

Pfft!

What kind of joke is that?!

We’re clearly not even the *same species*!