Chapter 15: Singlehood Is Self-Inflicted (Don’t Ask How I Know)

I carried the sleeping Monaluna down from the rooftop to my room. Gently laying the poor girl on the bed, I tucked her in. Her tear-streaked face and swollen eyes looked unbearably pitiful. I hadn’t realized so much sorrow had been piling up inside Monaluna. Thankfully, she’d cried it all out today—bottling it up would’ve made her sick eventually.

Slipping on the Star Absorption Gloves, I cast a water spell to wipe away her tears. Then I layered two life-magic buffs over her. Monaluna’s hitching breaths slowly steadied. Hope she has sweet dreams.

After tidying up, I threw on my coat and headed to the magic lab to find the Old Mage. Someone had been monitoring us with spiritual sense from the rooftop earlier—only withdrawing moments ago. Monaluna’s cultivation level couldn’t possibly detect it, but to me? It was like a lantern blazing in the dark. After tearing open Monaluna’s deepest wounds, I owed her grandfather a word. I was curious what excuses the old man would make.

“You came?” The Old Mage greeted me by the garden. So he’d already left the lab?

“Hmph. You’ve got free time.”

“Not as much as you. Playing therapist now?”

“Someone had to shatter her shell. Force her to face the world. You couldn’t bear to do it—so I did.”

“Nana finally let go of everything…”

“Call *that* letting go?” I cut him off. “It’s self-deception! Do as you please, but Monaluna has a whole life ahead—endless possibilities! Will you keep coddling her until she becomes worthless? I’d rather see her fight for revenge than hide from pain.”

The Old Mage fell silent, trembling finger pointed at me. No rebuttal came. He just sighed deeply. “Ah… I’m getting old.” Shaking his head, he shuffled toward the villa.

“Sorry, Master. I… got carried away. My own past flashed before me. I swear—I’ll protect Monaluna. No harm will touch her. She’s just like I was, years ago.”

He didn’t reply. Only kept muttering, “Old… so old…” as he disappeared inside.

Watching his retreating back, I turned and left the estate to clear my head. Monaluna was still asleep in my room—I couldn’t very well go back there. Might as well wander.

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“I’m back!” I returned to the estate after roaming all night. Breakfast time was non-negotiable. Why starve when Helle’s pancakes were legendary?

I strode straight to the dining room—just in time, since breakfast hadn’t started. Heh. Wait… why were everyone’s faces twisted in weird expressions?

“Young Master Klars! You’ve returned!” Helle bowed stiffly.

“Young Master? *You*? Helle, what’s wrong?”

“Young Master, you’re joking! Nothing’s wrong with me.”

*Uh-oh.* Past experience screamed: when Helle was mad, she switched from “Klars” to “Young Master Klars.” Adding “*You*”? She was furious.

I scurried to the table and sat across from Monaluna.

“Morning, Monaluna!”

“Ah? Ah! Um… morning.” Her hands fluttered wildly before she ducked her head, gripping her apron hem.

“How’d you sleep?”

*CRASH!* Helle dropped a plate in the kitchen. Monaluna gaped at me, eyes wide with horror. The Old Mage hid completely behind his *Magic Weekly*.

*What the actual hell?* Just casual small talk—why the nuclear reactions?

Helle stormed out and slapped me. Hard.

“You—why?!” I clutched my stinging cheek.

“Klars Masha! You shameless scoundrel! Doing *that* at night, then bringing it up in public? Have you no decency?!”

I glanced at the Old Mage. No help there—he hadn’t moved an inch behind his paper. Monaluna’s head was practically under the table. *Flexible kid… but what’s going ON?*

“I just wandered outside all night! Is skipping bedtime a crime now?”

Silence. The two girls flushed crimson. Helle’s face burned scarlet. *Is blushing contagious today?* I rubbed my five-fingered blush. “What ‘shameless’ thing did I even do?”

“N-nothing! Sorry, Klars, I just… ugh! It’s a misunderstanding!” Helle flustered.

“Whatever. Next time, confirm before swinging. Strong arm you’ve got…”

“I’m sorry! Let me rub it for you?” She reached for my face.

*Ah, sweet relief—*

*“Ahem!”* Monaluna’s overly loud cough cut through the air. Helle froze, glanced at her, then fled back to the kitchen.

*Damn.* Almost got a massage. My eyes drifted toward the kitchen—then searing pain shot up my calf. I nearly jumped out of my chair. The culprit? Monaluna, glaring daggers at me.

“What was that for?!”

“Don’t look at other women!”

“Whoa! Since when do you get to decide that?”

“I *do* decide! I’m the girl who slept in your bed—you can only look at *me* now.”

*Did she just say that?!* I whipped toward the Old Mage. Still reading calmly?! *Your granddaughter’s selling herself!*

“Monaluna, I didn’t even *sleep* in my room that night! We’re completely innocent.”

“But Grandpa said… if a girl spends the night in a boy’s room, she must marry him. Or the baby won’t have a father.”

*Too many plot holes to fix!*

“When did he tell you *that*?”

“Just now. At the table.”

I snapped my head around—catching a pair of twinkling eyes behind the newspaper before they vanished. *That petty old coot!* Payback for last night’s talk. He’d even tricked his own granddaughter.

“Monaluna, listen. That only happens if *both* a boy and girl sleep together in the room. Your grandpa left out the details.”

“Oh… I see…” Her shoulders relaxed slightly.

“Exactly, Miss,” Helle chimed in, setting down dishes. “Fishmonger Auntie Sally told me too—you need a man *and* woman in bed, and the woman must whip and torment the man until both are satisfied. *Then* babies come.”

*NO. ALL WRONG.* I pitied Sally’s husband deeply. *And stop corrupting kids!* Chills ran down my spine. *Dangerous topic—abort!*

“Wow! Smells amazing~ Breakfast must be incredible today.”

“I… I made it special. To thank you for yesterday’s gift.” Helle tucked her hair back, revealing the earrings. *She’s been wearing them. My craftsmanship’s not bad~*

“Klars, your story last night was so fun,” Monaluna murmured. “Tonight… just us two on the roof again? Tell me another?”

Helle’s smile froze. My temple throbbed. *‘Fun’? That story was depressing! And why emphasize ‘just us two’?!*

“Heh. Sure, sure!” I shoveled food into my mouth. *This place is a warzone. Need an exit strategy—stat.*

“Miss, planning to sleep in Young Master Klars’ room again tonight? I won’t wake you this time.”

“No problem! Klars’ bed is wide and soft—I’ll sleep longer!”

*My cramped single bed? ‘Wide and soft’? Since when?!* I glared at the newspaper. *Put it down and SAVE YOUR GRANDDAUGHTER!* He floated the paper with magic instead. *Master, your neutrality is terrifying.*

No escape. The old man was dead set on burying me. Paired with these two girls—zero biology knowledge, zero dating experience—was today my death day?

Understandable, really. One orphaned girl raised by a mage grandfather (good luck getting *that* sex talk). The other infamous in town—boys fled like she was the Grim Reaper. Zero romance experience. Their momentum was unstoppable.

I slipped on the Star Absorption Gloves under the table. *Time to retreat to the Gentleman’s Advance Association base.*

Spiritual energy surged. Wind magic coiled around my right middle finger—

“LOOK! A SHOOTING STAR!” I yelled, pointing out the window.

All heads snapped toward the glass—even the Old Mage’s.

*Now!*

Gale Step activated. I vanished.

*Phew. Saved by my genius…*

*…Why do I feel like I just wasted something precious?*