Meanwhile, the rest of the academy were still circling in the cave, like moths orbiting a cold lamp.

"Hey... we've been looping here forever, like a compass spinning in fog. I'm sure we've taken this path already!"

"Quit yapping! I said this is the right way, steady as bedrock; how could there be a problem?"

"Um... Young Lady, we already walked this road, like footprints closing a loop in wet sand."

"Ugh... even you say that... am I really—" Her heart dropped like a pebble vanishing down a well.

[Hahaha... bro, her defenses just cracked like thin ice in spring! She was playing adult, strutting upfront like a torchbearer, and this is it?]

'That's a bit much, isn't it?' My chest tightened like a drum skin.

[Yeah, yeah, I get it... but it's hilarious, like slapstick on a slick stage.]

"Be honest, you're map-blind, right?" My words came out dry, like dust in a drought.

[...]

"You're the map-blind one! I—this Young Lady—is a genius, bright as a new moon! At seven, I finished all the laws of the Radiant Empire, like reading a carved stele. I aced music exams, clear as a bell; my diplomacy is first-class, smooth as silk. I mastered every branch of magic, wide as the sea; by twelve, I finished all cutting-edge tech and magic, sharp as a drawn blade. I'm a peerless prodigy!"

"So, genius map-blind girl, where do we go next?" I smiled thin as paper.

"Waah! You're so loud! I told you it's not my problem, it's the wall's! This wall... it moves, like a shadow slipping along stone!"

Yanfengle narrowed his eyes at the wall, like a cat squinting at a shifting curtain, then gave Yingxuan a dead-fish stare, flat as a still pond.

"...Why are you staring at me? I already said it's the wall's problem!" Yingxuan stomped, like thunder in a tea cup.

"Quit stomping. With your weight, we'll trigger a quake, like a mountain rolling over."

"Ugh! You jerk, can you not? What do you mean 'with my weight'?! I only fell on you on the way down, like a sack dropping off a cart. Do you need to hold a grudge like moss on stone?"

"'Only'? I almost got crushed to death, like a beetle under a sandal! Young Lady... can't you maybe check a scale, like a judge weighing facts?"

"...The Young Lady weighs 36.8 kilograms," the little maid said, voice light as falling snow.

"..."

"..."

The air went awkward, like two cats staring in an alley, wide-eyed and silent.

"...Yueqin."

"Yes, Young Lady."

"You should learn when to speak and when not to, okay?♡" Her smile curved like a sickle moon.

"Understood, Young Lady, as you wish." The little maid bowed, crisp as a folding fan, which only made Yingxuan angrier, like steam trapped under a lid.

She had to find a trash bin for her anger, like a storm needing a river.

BOOM!!!

The cave shook hard, like a slumbering dragon turning in its sleep; everything quivered in a single breath.

"Ah, see, that's your delayed tremor, like thunder lagging behind lightning."

"Shut up, you jerk! It's an earthquake, like the earth beating a war drum!"

"Yueqin, find a spot—don't crouch and cover your head right there, like a turtle in the open—that's useless!" Yingxuan stomped, sparks in her voice, then yanked the little maid to a corner and squatted, tracing a glowing magic circle like a moon etched on stone.

"Hey, you sadistic creep over there, go find cover! If you get smashed before the teacher comes, I won't care, like a passerby in rain!"

"...You couldn't invite me to hide with you? Harsh, like a cold wind through a paper window."

[Count your blessings. She didn't take the chance to finish you off and bury you, like shoveling fresh dirt. Making girls this mad is a talent, like juggling knives.]

'Was I that out of line?' Guilt pricked like a thorn.

[Yes. Over the top—over-Feng, really—like a kite pulling past the string.]

"..." My mouth felt dry, like sand on my tongue.

"You idiot, why are you spacing out? Rocks are falling, like hail from a broken cloud!"

As Yanfengle looked up, dazed like a deer in torchlight, a red-gold fireball streaked over his scalp, skimming like a comet.

The fireball melted the rock in a blink, like wax before a flame, and then—

"Aaah—hot, hot—I'm on fire! My head—my head's on fire, like straw catching!"

"Serves you right. Just find cover, like a fox under a ledge. Hair matters less than life."

"Easy for you to say—hair is life, like a banner in battle! I need water, fast, or—"

"How could there be water here? When we came down, we only saw Goblins, like shadows in burrows, and no water anywhere!"

Yingxuan had barely finished when a blue torrent roared from the depths, like a river dragon bursting from its cave.

"Water!" Seeing the source of life, Yanfengle dove for it like a desert traveler sighting an oasis.

"How is there water here?!" Her voice pitched high, like a string pulled taut.

They tried to run, feet slapping like frantic fish, but there was no escape from a flood with no blind spots, like a wall of waves closing in, and the water swallowed them whole.