Unfamiliar place… yeah, right. It’s just an empty classroom, a hollow shell with no desks or chairs, like a shed stripped to bare bones.

Right—and a pack of bored idiots in FFF-logo uniforms glare at me like wolves ringed around a bonfire.

That’s the stare commoners throw at a Tyrant, like peasants squinting up at an iron throne.

Heh. I never thought this farce would pick me, like lightning striking a clear sky for fun.

I twitch a wrist. Useless. Tape coils my limbs like cold snakes, and my muscles won’t bite back.

Curtains are yanked tight, night nailed to the windows. The only light is the tribunal flame, spitting sparks while someone feeds it wood.

They’ve ditched the school uniform for their proud idiot brigade gear, faces bare like peeled masks tossed aside.

It’s too much since I woke, wave after wave. A harem-protagonist trial crashing onto me, and my heart teeters between tears and a crooked grin.

Yunshi Bianqi, Japanese, fifteen, first-year at Rakuyoku High School. Campus playboy. Rare-cute face, but he’s a boy—repeat, a boy—like a stamp hammered twice.

He keeps low like mist. A grade ace without a fixed circle. Girls cluster around him like moths to a lamp, hearts “stolen” in rumor-winds.

Of course, that’s just the dossier. Reality’s a different current. Heh…

So, why haul me here in duct tape? My voice drifts light as dust across concrete.

Bored in the corner, Yun Shi speaks, dead-fish eyes sliding over the culprits like cold rain on tin.

Those guys? The class’s infamous beauty-obsessives, the idiot trio. Their faces blaze like torches as they glare at the corner’s “trap.”

Of course it’s a trial, damn normie! Their shout cracks like a whip in a barn.

Can you feel the fury of us single dogs? Their breath frosts like winter on glass.

Why are you the harem lead when you’re just a fake girl? Their words jab like thorns.

Kurojo Taido, Morito Shiba, Muramasa Koji—aren’t you three bored to death? My tone is a flat stone skimming a lake.

Facing their bonfire rage, Yun Shi feels innocent first, then speaks. She did nothing, like a calm pond refusing the storm.

Silence! The FFF Brigade’s twentieth heresy trial begins. Their leader’s voice tolls like an iron bell. Is the culprit ready?

Reporting, Leader. All set—start it fast! Their reply pops like kindling.

Judge the most notorious playboy on campus! Their zeal flares like dry straw.

Set aside your weird lines. If this is the twentieth, how many victims came before? My sarcasm drips like candle wax.

That last jab’s mine. Fine, I want to rant—my mood spikes like a startled cat.

We do this for the nation! Their chest-thumps boom like drums.

Down with capitalism! The slogan flies like a ragged flag in storm wind.

Yeah, singlehood is the way. Opposite sex can buzz off! Their creed rattles like beads.

Nope. They’re broken, like radios hissing static. No talking to them. I sink against the wall and sigh like a deflating bellows.

Thinking back, maybe I went overboard. The girls around me have grown like spring ivy crawling a fence.

Guys, I have a Student Council meeting. If you don’t let me go, what’s your plan? My patience hangs by a thread like a spiderline.

Shut it, normie. You even bagged our gorgeous President! Their envy sparks like flint.

Not just that. You bagged the first-year top seat too, you scum! Their spitfire words snap like twigs.

You even bagged Misaki during class today! The rumor gallops like a loose horse.

Wow. I’m a real man then, huh. My deadpan lands like a pebble in a pond.

Truth is, I’ve got nowhere near that skill. The President almost ate me alive, like a hawk shadowing a mouse. Being judged like a male lead scratches an itch, sure—but I’m not handing out candy hearts.

Because this “male lead” isn’t male. The lead here… is a heroine, a spring blade hidden in straw.

Too bad these idiots don’t know. They see a normie, not the quiet truth folded like paper.

A girl with many girls around? That’s normal—friends flock like starlings. But in their eyes, Yun Shi is a guy, so every shadow twists.

Charge One: Yunshi Bianqi, you have too many girls around. We sacred members cannot endure it—accept judgment! Their verdict claps like thunder.

Objection. Girls around a boy are normal. Male students having female friends is normal, like sunlight on a schoolyard.

But you have too many female friends! Their finger-pointing pecks like crows.

…Huh? The word slips out like a startled leaf.

Charge Two: You conquered the Vice President! Their glee twirls like banners.

I don’t think I did… My denial trembles like a reed in wind.

Don’t deny it. We saw you flirting, then walking home together! Their certainty stands like a scarecrow in a field.

It was just walking home! What is wrong with you! My protest knocks like rain on shutters.

I want to argue, but they keep pulling papers from nowhere, reading Yunshi Bianqi’s sins like a cursed litany unrolling.

Charge Three: You even conquered the “never to be conquered” yuri class rep, Maya Hanazaka. That’s pure sin! Their outrage hisses like steam.

…Honestly, that might be true. My thought blushes like a peach.

About Maya Hanazaka—no wonder she treats “a boy” like me so well. Because Yun Shi isn’t a boy. Once the yuri rep learned I’m a girl, her attitude flipped like a kite in a gust.

These people know nothing, wandering blind like moles.

Charge Four: You’ve got a thing with Class B’s Liu Bingtang and Class C’s Song Hai! Their claim scuttles like crabs.

Hey, are you kidding me? When did that rumor hatch? My voice swats like a hand at a mosquito.

Charge Five: Most unforgivable—three months ago you and the goddess Sham were a pair. We grudgingly accepted it then, but you abandoned her, chased girls, built a harem. Unforgivable! Throwing away a goddess that radiant! Their grief wails like a temple horn.

When were we a couple? She clearly has a girlfriend! My truth stands like a rock in river spray.

Unforgivable! You’ve got so many girls orbiting you, and you’ve been cozy with the Vice President lately—boiling hot! Their anger crackles like grease.

They don’t listen. They vent, voices like storm rain splattering a tin roof.

So dumb. No reasons, just noise. Is this the wrath of single dogs? Maybe. Once, I was FFF too, so I get it. But I can’t accept it. The real world never lacks idiots; they buzz like summer cicadas.

Hold up. A thread glints like a silver fish.

Hey, do you seriously have zero female friends? My question drifts like smoke across their faces.

They freeze at once, silence dropping like a curtain. The rowdies quiet, eyes blank as snowfields.

In class, boys don’t actually repel girls. If they behave, no one minds. I’ve seen boys laughing with girls, just simple friendship, light as wind. Back then, I even cursed those boys under my breath.

No way… The doubt hangs like fog above their heads.

Maybe it’s true. These guys are hardcore beauty-obsessed. They even run fan clubs—Sham’s “Guardian Goddess,” Mizuki’s Vice President Admirers. All their handiwork. And the girls? They formed a secret Yuri Club, swooning over a certain yuri queen.

I recall girls whispering that these boys are gross, idol-hoarders, basically virgins. Their words clattered like falling beads.

Pathetic. Lonely single dogs with zero girls—reap what you sow. My disdain slices like a cold wind.

Yun Shi, seeing the truth, looks down, eyes like knives, and the idiots flinch like grass in hail.

I’m sorry I’ve never spoken to a girl… The confession dribbles like rain.

Just once, I want to hold a girl’s hand… The wish is pale as moonlight.

Even a single word from a girl would be enough… Their hope is a brittle leaf.

If a girl stood before me, I’d confess at once… The bravado puffs like a sparrow.

Why is there not a single female here… The lament echoes like an empty well.

Watching them slump into random sorrow, I feel awkward pain. Not egg pain—girl pain—like a cat pawing its own tail.

Boys, a girl is right here. You already talked to her. She even scolded you. Idiots—you can’t see it. The girl is right in front of you, bright as noon.

Let me go back. I’m done playing. My patience fades like dusk.

I don’t want to deal with them. I just want to return. The Student Council meeting’s probably over, its minutes cooling like tea. I’ll skip today’s report. Tomorrow I’ll explain to Asagi Renka. She knows I got nabbed by idiots for a mock trial; she’ll understand. That’s the grace of girls, soft as silk.

Go back? Like we’d let you! The Leader’s glare is bloodshot, eyes like cracked rubies, voice tearing like cloth.

You done yet? How many boys have you dragged here? I bet our class boys fear talking to girls now. My words slap like a wave.

No. So far only you have defeated us. Yun Shi, you’re a terrifying enemy! His praise grinds like gravel.

No, I didn’t do anything. You’re the ones playing pretend. My reply is flat as slate.

But why are their gazes turning weird, like cats seeing a laser dot?

Speaking of which, Yun Shi, you look pretty cute. The line lands like a feather.

Right, we haven’t announced your verdict. The reminder flicks like a switch.

As your sentence, try this on once. He lifts fabric like a magician’s scarf.

From nowhere, they pull a girls’ uniform from Rakuyoku High School. It’s my size, fitting like a net cast by fate.

…

Yun Shi’s face goes slate-blue, silence freezing like winter frost on glass.

What kind of yarn of a joke is this! If I put that on… my secret will explode like fireworks at midnight!

D-Don’t joke! I-I’m a boy! The denial stumbles like a fawn.

I scramble back. Cold sweat slicks my spine like rain on stone. The wall rises behind me like a cliff.

Out of options, I stare with wide, pleading eyes. The FFF Brigade closes in like a tide nibbling the shore.

My big, watery eyes pour out softness like warm lamp light, a mercy that makes hands hesitate in midair.

Yun Shi, sorry. I just… want a girlfriend! His plea wobbles like jelly.

Damn it, aren’t you a guy? Why show such a cute face! His panic flaps like a startled pigeon.

Ahh, at this rate I’ll sell my soul to Lord Lucifer! His drama howls like a midnight wolf.

Damn, I’m not even gay! The denial snaps like a twig.

Why is this guy a boy! The complaint thumps like a drum.

Watching them spiral into chaos, I don’t bother with more snark. The real crisis roars inside me like a waterfall.

If they force that uniform on me, my secret will detonate. This could slide into a hentai plotline, dark as ink.

No, please. I’m still young. I don’t want to become an “adult” yet! My scream is a sparrow beating against a window.

I only like girls, not guys—someone save me!

No—don’t come closer, don’t touch me; you jerks, get away!

Yun Shi thrashed and backpedaled like a scalded cat; panic hit first, then recoil. Even with the wall behind her, she kept inching back—instinct, like a cornered doe. Heaven, somebody save me!

...

Yun Shi, a girl in a boy’s uniform, moved with lethal softness; boys gulped, throats bobbing like carp. It only deepened their urge to doll her up. They crowded in, a tide of bodies like surf, and she flinched hard.

Help, anyone!

Honestly, anyone would fear that—especially a girl—under wolfish stares that bite like winter.

Boom!

The empty classroom’s door was blasted open; the panel flew off and slammed the boy clutching a girl’s uniform—brutal. Dust rose across the floor like fog at dawn. The boy lay sprawled like a corpse. Footsteps approached from the hall, steady as drums. The FFF Squad twisted their necks, stiff as puppets, and stared at the doorway.

Maya Hanazaka stood there, face storm-black, shadowed rage boiling behind her like smoke. Her blank stare felt deadly, a calm ocean before a typhoon; the FFF Squad sensed danger at once. Seeing Yun Shi tied in the corner, eyes wide on her, Maya’s anger flared like oil catching fire.

Such nerve—to act up under my nose, and you even tied her up. Starving, aren’t you, you filthy men?

She had a woodcutter’s machete in hand. Face storm-black, heart near explosion, she stepped forward like doom.

Wait, Class Rep, it’s not what it looks like!

Die, all of you! You dared lay hands on her!

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

Men are all the same—won’t listen, won’t stop—just a pack of perverts!

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

Got tiger guts, huh? Doing filth in school—watch me strip your skins!

Aaaaaaaaaaaah!

Scream. Keep screaming. I’ll show you what brazen means.

Ahhh, Class Rep, please trample me harder; curse me with cruel words...

When Maya goes berserk, it’s a slaughter; brothers, pray for your own lives. Also, is that last guy a full-on masochist...?

I’m grateful someone came, but... that was terrifying.

Yun Shi leaned against the corner wall, watching the FFF Squad get pummeled. Sympathy flickered, and relief warmed her like morning sun.

Being a girl is... such a blessing.

At least I won’t get beaten up by a yuri girl.